She Said "I Love You" First. Me, Last.

Christene passed me a note in group one day.
I had been prattling on about loneliness and despair
Because "no one cared."
She did, she thought.
Or could.

We ate together.
We talked.
We laughed and

She said "I love you, Joe Sweeney"
Within ten days or so.

I had never heard those words before
(Or have heard them since.)
Grasping sucking on devouring with all I had
Knowing I was in the wrong right place,
I answered "I love you too, Christene" finally, weeks later.

We moved in together.
Really, I moved mine into her space.
Desperate anxious scared nervously optimistic.

Up soon bubbled unspoken arguments
About me.
What was I doing with myself?
Why was I like this and
Why was I like that?

She found another
And slept on the couch.
While I packed and
Remembered.

Only the good times
Were in my mind
When I said,
"Could we make love one last time?"
Tears flowing, she answered
By not answering.

And then I said it last.