The Great Fatwa of 1432 AH
Transcript of email sent to David Letterman , 8/22/11 8:32am EST, and forwarded to CIA --
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Dear Mr. Evil American Talk Show Host David Letterman;
We will kill you, Jewish American swine! Let this email serve to announce The Great Fatwa of 1432 AH. The time of punishment and Allah's mighty justice is upon you.
The armies of Islam are on the march, ready to spill Semetic blood on the very soil of New York City which you call home, you callous, antiquated, short haired, non-bearded Jewish scum. Do you know that we can reach out past the shores of America at will, silencing your words at a time of our choosing? Be prepared to die, Mr. Funny Man, as that day is surely here.
We will silence you and your tiny Canadian singer of American pop songs, Paul Shaffer, and the red headed bastard child, Alan Kalter, at a time and place of our choosing. It will come both soon and swiftly, and you will not be given the blessing of hearing our swinging swords prior to your beheadings.
Your infidel nation will soon come to an end, and an Islamic world where men in thawbs, long manly beards, and many goats rule the land of Allah will live for a thousand and one years. Our women are more virginal, our cities safer, and our peasant class much more servile than anything to be found in America, and we shall dominate the land of our ancestors forever.
Your comedy show sickens us, and, further, Arab comedy is much, much funnier. The very best Arab television programs are "Goat Head Soccer Wives", "Slumdog Superstar" and "Islam 2NITE". Our comedy writers are pure of heart, and have many more wives than yours.
Your Jewish country features nothing we desire. Among the reasons that our Islamic homeland is better than America: Your nearest neighbor is Canada. Ours is Israel. Much easier to jihad. There are no black people in the Islamic world, and thus less crime and illliteracy. Fewer earthquakes and no hurricanes here: only the occasional ten year sand storm and locust plague. Our lands are gloriously dirt and crime free.
Jewboy, The Great Fatwa of 1432 AH will now describe exactly what we are going to do to you within two weeks: We will first cut out your tongue, slice it into 200 pieces, and feed it to our camel herd for breakfast. They will surely enjoy the succulent taste of American flesh. Next we will cut off your four limbs with khobz knives, and serve them to our wives for lunch with mutabbaq and camel milk. Your torso will be made into kabsa, to be served to our children during dinnertime along with lamb's bread. Your vile American infidel skull will be used to play soccer with for four days, after which we will grind your brains into fine knafeh and qatayef paste and serve them on bread with a platter of Gashaata confection. We will feast on your flesh for three weeks.
Know that we are coming and be fearful, as your Jewish overlords will not save you from the steely wrath of Allah.
Best,
The Great Fatwa of 1432 AH staff
cc
evil warlord Les Moonves
Carol Liefer, Zionist American "comedy" writer & future wife to Aaban Fakhoury, great prince of The Great Fatwa of 1432
American "funnyman" Jay Leno, who will be our next fatwa
===============================
Dear Mr. Evil American Talk Show Host David Letterman;
We will kill you, Jewish American swine! Let this email serve to announce The Great Fatwa of 1432 AH. The time of punishment and Allah's mighty justice is upon you.
The armies of Islam are on the march, ready to spill Semetic blood on the very soil of New York City which you call home, you callous, antiquated, short haired, non-bearded Jewish scum. Do you know that we can reach out past the shores of America at will, silencing your words at a time of our choosing? Be prepared to die, Mr. Funny Man, as that day is surely here.
We will silence you and your tiny Canadian singer of American pop songs, Paul Shaffer, and the red headed bastard child, Alan Kalter, at a time and place of our choosing. It will come both soon and swiftly, and you will not be given the blessing of hearing our swinging swords prior to your beheadings.
Your infidel nation will soon come to an end, and an Islamic world where men in thawbs, long manly beards, and many goats rule the land of Allah will live for a thousand and one years. Our women are more virginal, our cities safer, and our peasant class much more servile than anything to be found in America, and we shall dominate the land of our ancestors forever.
Your comedy show sickens us, and, further, Arab comedy is much, much funnier. The very best Arab television programs are "Goat Head Soccer Wives", "Slumdog Superstar" and "Islam 2NITE". Our comedy writers are pure of heart, and have many more wives than yours.
Your Jewish country features nothing we desire. Among the reasons that our Islamic homeland is better than America: Your nearest neighbor is Canada. Ours is Israel. Much easier to jihad. There are no black people in the Islamic world, and thus less crime and illliteracy. Fewer earthquakes and no hurricanes here: only the occasional ten year sand storm and locust plague. Our lands are gloriously dirt and crime free.
Jewboy, The Great Fatwa of 1432 AH will now describe exactly what we are going to do to you within two weeks: We will first cut out your tongue, slice it into 200 pieces, and feed it to our camel herd for breakfast. They will surely enjoy the succulent taste of American flesh. Next we will cut off your four limbs with khobz knives, and serve them to our wives for lunch with mutabbaq and camel milk. Your torso will be made into kabsa, to be served to our children during dinnertime along with lamb's bread. Your vile American infidel skull will be used to play soccer with for four days, after which we will grind your brains into fine knafeh and qatayef paste and serve them on bread with a platter of Gashaata confection. We will feast on your flesh for three weeks.
Know that we are coming and be fearful, as your Jewish overlords will not save you from the steely wrath of Allah.
Best,
The Great Fatwa of 1432 AH staff
cc
evil warlord Les Moonves
Carol Liefer, Zionist American "comedy" writer & future wife to Aaban Fakhoury, great prince of The Great Fatwa of 1432
American "funnyman" Jay Leno, who will be our next fatwa
posted by joe sweeney at 12:31 AM
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