Can't wait to vote on Tuesday....
God, I am just dying to vote for Olympia Snowe! She is going to just totally ass-fuck all the lazy welfare cheats out of our great nation. Wow, will that be cool! Saw a bunch of her minions over at the Maine Mall an hour or so ago. So cute, so adorable, so blonde, so anglo. I asked them if they were going to totally ass-fuck all the poor losers here in Maine after the election, and they practically giggled with joy. "Oh yeah, we're gonna totally ass-fuck the folks who live off the fat of our own tax dollars! At least, that is, when we begin to pay taxes, after graduation. Yup. An ass-fucking is gonna go down like shit through a goose!"
I was pleased, and directed the Apartment404 Escalade (bumper sticker: Let's totally ass-fuck the poor!) back towards home.
Upon returning to Apartment404, the staff decided it was a good time to read the morning's paper.
And in the local news section, there's a massive story about Big Hat Guy. Cool! We're down with Big Hat Guy!
He's even wearing a Big Hat in his picture. Kinda sexy, if you ask us. Though when you're almost totally bald, Big Hats are a necessity.
The following quotes come from some of the dick-sucking by "writer" David Hench that can be found in the Portland Press Herald article:
"(H)is management style has drawn praise for several quarters."
"Year at the helm quiets controversy for (Big Hat Guy)."
"(Big Hat Guy's) low key style wins support from city and neighborhood leaders...."
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BHG: "Oh gawd.....oh gawd...keep going, David....don't stop..".
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"(Big Hat Guy) is thoughtful and deliberate, sounding more like a management consultant than a street cop."
"(Big Hat Guy's) low key style is winning support from city officials and neighborhood leaders, as well as...approval from rank-and-file (Ass-Rapists)."
"Portland City Manager Joe Grey...says (Big Hat Guy's) style and substance are just what the city needs right now."
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BHG: "Almost there...oh lordy...almost there..."
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"The Rev. Kenneth Lewis, vice president of the Portland branch of the (National Association of Uncle Tom's), who served on a panel that interviewed the candidates, said he never doubted that (Big Hat Guy) would do a commendable job, and he has not been disappointed. 'He has certainly made efforts to reach out to the community,' Lewis said. 'There's a lot going on in the city, but I think as a steward of the department, (Big Hat Guy) has been open and sought some community input.....(Big Hat Guy) is a student of his work,' Lewis said, 'He's a student of policing, He can be a teacher to the rank and file and the command staff as well as to the community about how to make this a safer city, a more livable city for all people."
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BHG: "Oh YEAHHHHHHHHH!.....Wheh. Ok, David, give the Reverend his turn now."
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Postscript: As one of our stupider interns had two unpaid parking tickets, we are all expecting four or five cops to enter Apartment404 sometime soon and shoot us all "as many as 20 times". Come get it, ass rapists. We are armed only with our halfwits.
I was pleased, and directed the Apartment404 Escalade (bumper sticker: Let's totally ass-fuck the poor!) back towards home.
Upon returning to Apartment404, the staff decided it was a good time to read the morning's paper.
And in the local news section, there's a massive story about Big Hat Guy. Cool! We're down with Big Hat Guy!
He's even wearing a Big Hat in his picture. Kinda sexy, if you ask us. Though when you're almost totally bald, Big Hats are a necessity.
The following quotes come from some of the dick-sucking by "writer" David Hench that can be found in the Portland Press Herald article:
"(H)is management style has drawn praise for several quarters."
"Year at the helm quiets controversy for (Big Hat Guy)."
"(Big Hat Guy's) low key style wins support from city and neighborhood leaders...."
--------------------------------------------------
BHG: "Oh gawd.....oh gawd...keep going, David....don't stop..".
-------------------------------------------------
"(Big Hat Guy) is thoughtful and deliberate, sounding more like a management consultant than a street cop."
"(Big Hat Guy's) low key style is winning support from city officials and neighborhood leaders, as well as...approval from rank-and-file (Ass-Rapists)."
"Portland City Manager Joe Grey...says (Big Hat Guy's) style and substance are just what the city needs right now."
-------------------------------------------------
BHG: "Almost there...oh lordy...almost there..."
-------------------------------------------------
"The Rev. Kenneth Lewis, vice president of the Portland branch of the (National Association of Uncle Tom's), who served on a panel that interviewed the candidates, said he never doubted that (Big Hat Guy) would do a commendable job, and he has not been disappointed. 'He has certainly made efforts to reach out to the community,' Lewis said. 'There's a lot going on in the city, but I think as a steward of the department, (Big Hat Guy) has been open and sought some community input.....(Big Hat Guy) is a student of his work,' Lewis said, 'He's a student of policing, He can be a teacher to the rank and file and the command staff as well as to the community about how to make this a safer city, a more livable city for all people."
------------------------------------------------
BHG: "Oh YEAHHHHHHHHH!.....Wheh. Ok, David, give the Reverend his turn now."
------------------------------------------------
Postscript: As one of our stupider interns had two unpaid parking tickets, we are all expecting four or five cops to enter Apartment404 sometime soon and shoot us all "as many as 20 times". Come get it, ass rapists. We are armed only with our halfwits.
posted by joe sweeney at 2:24 PM
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