Thoughts. Deep.

-- "Modern Family", ABC's heavily hyped and critically raved about first year sitcom, has been depressingly boring the last half dozen or so episodes. Have they run out of things to say already, in their very first season? Very little character development has taken place, so it's basically normal, dull people trying to say clever things to each for 22 minutes. And Mitchell and Cameron are the straightest and most annoying gay dudes in the history of television couplehood: absolutely no sex appeal between the two. I am not aware of even a kiss between the two homos, and Mitchell just need a good slap sometimes to wipe that smirk off his face. Has ABC told the show's producers to tone down the dick up the ass humor for us, the great unwashed? Because the show begs for some spice. They need to take some chances or "Modern Family", which showed great potential this fall, will become as worthless as anything ever made by Ray Romano.


-- Man, do I love going to a football/baseball/basketball/hockey game about 45 minutes early and watching the team's warm up. To me, attending pregame is like going to a wedding: everyone is happy and optimistic that all will work out incredibly well. The participants are all dressed beautifully, checking out each others attire, smiling and winking to one and all. The coaches are the fathers of the bride and groom, beaming with pride at what their offspring/players are about to accomplish.

-- The games themselves are usually more like marriage (or warfare): intermittent terror and excitement followed by excruciating boredom for long stretches.


-- The city of Portland must tear down Cumberland County Civic Center and build a more modern arena, and soon. More modern in the sense that 6 2 300 pounders like myself and so many other Americans should be able to sit and watch a two or three hour event without needing medical attention following. More legroom, please. More assroom, please.


-- "Shutter Island" is entertaining. Too long, a high grade B movie, and far from Martin Scorcese's best work. But entertaining nonetheless. Recommended for mature viewers (don't bring the kids).


-- As soon as the cash can be raised (we're thinking of selling plasma...or Rudy the cat) there will a be new tattoo placed somewhere on the person of a staff member of Apartment 404, hopefully sometime next week. And it will be located in a place only those who are intimate with said staff member (or take a shower with them at World Gym) will be able to see.


-- The DVD for "This Is It" is a must have for any fan of pop music. Jackson's handlers must be waiting for the buying frenzy to stall somewhat before they release the soundtrack (which kicks ass).


-- To ever write, you must read. Lots.

-- To ever teach, you must be willing to learn.