Movies That Should Be Remade....And How
"Foxes" - 1980 - Jodie Foster was 18 when this gritty high school drama came out, directed by the great Adrian Lyne. Is Blake Lively too old to pull this off? Lyne did an amazing job with his young actors; that's why the original resonates. He didn't fuck around: some bad shit happened to the girls. Amazing material. Maybe instead of Lively the casting could be real young, like "13" young. That's what MTV has done with their stuff lately.
"Sweet Smell of Success" - 1957 - Killer noir material. How has this not been done already? Change the sexes of the two stars and you got something pretty sexy. More relevant than ever with the phone hacking scandal going on.
"Internal Affairs" - 1990 - Richard Gere and Andy Garcia should have just gotten it over with and had sex in this really cool movie. Gere was bad, bad, bad and so sexy. Incredible material but cop dramas are a dime a dozen. How do you make this special? How do you get someone to do as great a job as Gere did? That's tough. I could watch Ryan Gosling in anything, but he has a similar vibe to Gere: maybe not the best way to go. How about someone more creepy than sexy? Like Jeremy Piven. Yeah, that'd work. He can play badass.
"The Lady From Shanghai" - 1947 - To fill the Rita Hayworth role you gotta get someone smart enough and sexy enough that a rube sailer would kill for her. That's tough. She's gotta look like high society, too. Gwyneth? I see the female lead as being very tall and intimidating. For the sailor, how about someone short like Jack Black, or Seth Rogan (seriously).
"The Stranger" - 1946 - Change the Nazi professor to a Serb and you got a movie. Amazing film by Welles, but the remake could improve on it, I think. Or maybe have the professor be from China.
"The Black Hole" - 1979 - Great camp. Lots of scenery being chewed in the original. This would make a funny cool summer movie a few years down the line.
"Hud" - 1963 - Can you spell "Ryan Gosling?" He has amazing charisma. Who would play Patricia Neal's character? You can't improve on perfection, but there's plenty of 40 something actresses who could do it. Marisa Tomei possibly, or how about the amazing Jamie Lee Curtis? Perfect age for the part. "The Body" could kill in the Neal role. Curtis has sex appeal and likeability and has the same earthiness about her that Patricia Neal provided.
"Fat City" - 1972 - If anyone suggests changing the boxing to MMA I'm gonna get mad. Boxing is a dying sport, MMA on the rise. Boxing would be better. Lots of poor Hispanic kids go through what Stacy Keach and Jeff Bridges did. The original is the most underrated of John Huston's many incredible films. I can still feel every punch, every drunk that I saw onscreen. Keach's lush of a lover is obviously an incredible role; got Susan Tyrrell an Oscar nomination. So many of the movies that I feel should be remade feature awesome material for actresses in their late 30s and 40s. Guess that's because I want to fuck so many of these great ladies. Sorry. Incredible, ripe, relevant material in "Fat City."
"The Informer" - 1935 - "Frankie, Frankie, your mother forgives me!" How many actors would give a testicle to get to play the final scene?
"Hopscotch" - 1980 - Glenda Jackson was 43 to Matthau's 60 year old in this one. I don't know how this movie ever got made but it was brilliant and fun. You could just do an almost shot by shot remake of this one and I'd still hand over my eight bucks.
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I know all this material is in development somewhere, but I don't want to die of old age having never seen Bruce Willis utter the line, "Frankie, Frankie, your mother forgives me!"
"Sweet Smell of Success" - 1957 - Killer noir material. How has this not been done already? Change the sexes of the two stars and you got something pretty sexy. More relevant than ever with the phone hacking scandal going on.
"Internal Affairs" - 1990 - Richard Gere and Andy Garcia should have just gotten it over with and had sex in this really cool movie. Gere was bad, bad, bad and so sexy. Incredible material but cop dramas are a dime a dozen. How do you make this special? How do you get someone to do as great a job as Gere did? That's tough. I could watch Ryan Gosling in anything, but he has a similar vibe to Gere: maybe not the best way to go. How about someone more creepy than sexy? Like Jeremy Piven. Yeah, that'd work. He can play badass.
"The Lady From Shanghai" - 1947 - To fill the Rita Hayworth role you gotta get someone smart enough and sexy enough that a rube sailer would kill for her. That's tough. She's gotta look like high society, too. Gwyneth? I see the female lead as being very tall and intimidating. For the sailor, how about someone short like Jack Black, or Seth Rogan (seriously).
"The Stranger" - 1946 - Change the Nazi professor to a Serb and you got a movie. Amazing film by Welles, but the remake could improve on it, I think. Or maybe have the professor be from China.
"The Black Hole" - 1979 - Great camp. Lots of scenery being chewed in the original. This would make a funny cool summer movie a few years down the line.
"Hud" - 1963 - Can you spell "Ryan Gosling?" He has amazing charisma. Who would play Patricia Neal's character? You can't improve on perfection, but there's plenty of 40 something actresses who could do it. Marisa Tomei possibly, or how about the amazing Jamie Lee Curtis? Perfect age for the part. "The Body" could kill in the Neal role. Curtis has sex appeal and likeability and has the same earthiness about her that Patricia Neal provided.
"Fat City" - 1972 - If anyone suggests changing the boxing to MMA I'm gonna get mad. Boxing is a dying sport, MMA on the rise. Boxing would be better. Lots of poor Hispanic kids go through what Stacy Keach and Jeff Bridges did. The original is the most underrated of John Huston's many incredible films. I can still feel every punch, every drunk that I saw onscreen. Keach's lush of a lover is obviously an incredible role; got Susan Tyrrell an Oscar nomination. So many of the movies that I feel should be remade feature awesome material for actresses in their late 30s and 40s. Guess that's because I want to fuck so many of these great ladies. Sorry. Incredible, ripe, relevant material in "Fat City."
"The Informer" - 1935 - "Frankie, Frankie, your mother forgives me!" How many actors would give a testicle to get to play the final scene?
"Hopscotch" - 1980 - Glenda Jackson was 43 to Matthau's 60 year old in this one. I don't know how this movie ever got made but it was brilliant and fun. You could just do an almost shot by shot remake of this one and I'd still hand over my eight bucks.
=================
I know all this material is in development somewhere, but I don't want to die of old age having never seen Bruce Willis utter the line, "Frankie, Frankie, your mother forgives me!"
posted by joe sweeney at 9:40 AM
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