Fat LeBron All Stars
I can see it now: "Playing small forward for your San Diego Clippers, weighing in at 325 pounds, standing at 6 feet 9 and 3/4 inches, from The Ohio State University...no... St. Vincent/St. Mary's High Seminary... Faaaaaaaat LeBron James!"
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No rings, hemorraging cash (investments in Friendly's, Applebees, any restaurant you can point a fucking finger at, didn't work out), friendless, soulless, diploma less, LeBron comes out of retirement at age 41 to play for the San Diego Clippers in 2025. He backs up his son, LeBron II, at the 3, getting about 15 heavy breathing minutes a night.
His jersey sales ranking at number 312 for the league (others: #311: Bob McAdoo, #245: Randy Smith, #55: Kermit, #11: Larry, #1: Austin Rivers), LeBron plays the Point Blank Forward. Can't pass, can't shoot, can't dribble, not a good teammate. Point Blank. Nothing but a big tub of lard.
The Clips are owned, as always, by Donald Sterling, still going strong and firing ushers at 92 years of age. Playoff contenders the prior year (THIS IS IT was the marketing slogan. Cost a shitload.), Sterling wanted someone to "put the team over the hump, for the fans" and pulled Fat LeBron off the scrap heap.
It was not to be, as Fat LeBron and his teammates missed the 2024-25 playoffs bythismuch. Better luck next year.
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Inspired by "The Office"
Must watch TV
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No rings, hemorraging cash (investments in Friendly's, Applebees, any restaurant you can point a fucking finger at, didn't work out), friendless, soulless, diploma less, LeBron comes out of retirement at age 41 to play for the San Diego Clippers in 2025. He backs up his son, LeBron II, at the 3, getting about 15 heavy breathing minutes a night.
His jersey sales ranking at number 312 for the league (others: #311: Bob McAdoo, #245: Randy Smith, #55: Kermit, #11: Larry, #1: Austin Rivers), LeBron plays the Point Blank Forward. Can't pass, can't shoot, can't dribble, not a good teammate. Point Blank. Nothing but a big tub of lard.
The Clips are owned, as always, by Donald Sterling, still going strong and firing ushers at 92 years of age. Playoff contenders the prior year (THIS IS IT was the marketing slogan. Cost a shitload.), Sterling wanted someone to "put the team over the hump, for the fans" and pulled Fat LeBron off the scrap heap.
It was not to be, as Fat LeBron and his teammates missed the 2024-25 playoffs bythismuch. Better luck next year.
=================
Inspired by "The Office"
Must watch TV
posted by joe sweeney at 2:46 PM
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