Hello Out There...

My name is Joe Sweeney. I'm the head...ok...only writer on this here blog, and I live in Portland, ME.

My grandparents were street drunks and child molesters. I have ten dollars to my name. My apartment is without heat.

I've had to scratch and claw my way in this fucked up world for almost everything I have, which ain't much presently.

I am America.

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Please send a $20.12 check to the President, care of the White House, made out to the "Free Joe Sweeney Fund"

President Obama
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW
Washington, DC 20500

He'll be sure to answer each and every one in time.

Don't you love getting a real letter in the mail, with a fucking stamp on it and everything? I do. No nasty notes, either. Show some respect.

Chinese food for everyone when this is finished. It's on me.

Love,
Joe Sweeney
Apartment404.blogspot.com