Thankfully, that's over with...
2/17/07 2:00am...
...
There’s always a reason
To do something
Or to do nothing.
They look at me
Right through me.
Agendas
Ballerinas
I have none of it.
In me
There is only Hurt.
Which they exploit
Funny funny.
...
The one with the whiny voice and the fat stomach
Teaches how to stretch
And how to hide.
...
Not sure why there is
No hair on my legs.
Yesterday, woke up
With a swollen nose.
This a.m. had a
Fat lip.
Why?
Paranoid, you better be.
“Mark-E” strikes me as funny
Does it get the joke?
A Benz, I think.
...
Giving me the finger
From a Toy-ota
With that bumper sticker,
“Support the Troops”
How so
Lady in a fake fur?
Laugh? Cry.
...
U-turn. Big yellow car.
Drive. Wonder why.
“RU-Broke”
or some such.
Pissed? Yeah.
Driving fast and fun.
Laughing
Pass him.
Big Banana Car.
“Range Rover.” Big joke
Post office safely.
Pull over, roll down window.
“Do you want to hit me?”
He’s on phone.
Banana split, motherfucker.
I laugh and laugh
He goes to work.
...
With nowhere to go
And no one to be.
The women on the walls
All laugh and laugh.
“He’s so sad.”
“He’s so sad.”
Why am “I” there?
I want to be up there
So others can stare
At me.
...
Is it making fun of me?
Is it making fun of me?
Not at all.
Crying out for some reason
To hear and call.
Do I want to become Pesci?
Bitter. Sad. and not rich.
Or someone else.
Making it up as we go
That we are.
...
The New Yorker fucks me.
Ricky Gervais fucks me.
“The Office” fucks me as hard as they can
then wait for the ratings to roll in.
They all fuck me.
The players fuck me.
...
I need some dead guy
To laugh at
Or with, even.
Which one is worst of all?
No clue.
Because they’ve never bothered to write
Or call.
Life is all material for “Fine Art.”
...
I wish I didn’t know
Everything
I know today.
Wanna be blind
Wanna be cold
Wanna disappear.
...
Good liars
Make awful people
To spend time next to.
Looks good.
Plays rough.
Gets cheated.
“I outed him.”
So sad.
So maddening
So scary.
...
...
...
The Medical Profession
...
“Our tests show that you’re
Allergic to grain.”
A Georgetown alumnus
Afraid of a big ass.
“I thought he was just another nut
otherwise I would have paid
attention.”
This hurts.
This hurts so much.
“So when should we make our next appointment?”
Later on
Making fun of America’s great grandmother
Makes her brighten and laugh
While she remembers to forget
What she did to me
Over and over
And over.
...
“Hospital”
...
Every word out of their three mouths
Is a lie.
“I know now I have courage.”
I write
And they keep me even longer.
To prove it.
--------------------------------
2 days, 3 days, 4.
Keep movin' it forward.
Don't cross off the days on any damn calender
Cuz that's one day less to live.
1 2 3 4
Much much much much more.
...
There’s always a reason
To do something
Or to do nothing.
They look at me
Right through me.
Agendas
Ballerinas
I have none of it.
In me
There is only Hurt.
Which they exploit
Funny funny.
...
The one with the whiny voice and the fat stomach
Teaches how to stretch
And how to hide.
...
Not sure why there is
No hair on my legs.
Yesterday, woke up
With a swollen nose.
This a.m. had a
Fat lip.
Why?
Paranoid, you better be.
“Mark-E” strikes me as funny
Does it get the joke?
A Benz, I think.
...
Giving me the finger
From a Toy-ota
With that bumper sticker,
“Support the Troops”
How so
Lady in a fake fur?
Laugh? Cry.
...
U-turn. Big yellow car.
Drive. Wonder why.
“RU-Broke”
or some such.
Pissed? Yeah.
Driving fast and fun.
Laughing
Pass him.
Big Banana Car.
“Range Rover.” Big joke
Post office safely.
Pull over, roll down window.
“Do you want to hit me?”
He’s on phone.
Banana split, motherfucker.
I laugh and laugh
He goes to work.
...
With nowhere to go
And no one to be.
The women on the walls
All laugh and laugh.
“He’s so sad.”
“He’s so sad.”
Why am “I” there?
I want to be up there
So others can stare
At me.
...
Is it making fun of me?
Is it making fun of me?
Not at all.
Crying out for some reason
To hear and call.
Do I want to become Pesci?
Bitter. Sad. and not rich.
Or someone else.
Making it up as we go
That we are.
...
The New Yorker fucks me.
Ricky Gervais fucks me.
“The Office” fucks me as hard as they can
then wait for the ratings to roll in.
They all fuck me.
The players fuck me.
...
I need some dead guy
To laugh at
Or with, even.
Which one is worst of all?
No clue.
Because they’ve never bothered to write
Or call.
Life is all material for “Fine Art.”
...
I wish I didn’t know
Everything
I know today.
Wanna be blind
Wanna be cold
Wanna disappear.
...
Good liars
Make awful people
To spend time next to.
Looks good.
Plays rough.
Gets cheated.
“I outed him.”
So sad.
So maddening
So scary.
...
...
...
The Medical Profession
...
“Our tests show that you’re
Allergic to grain.”
A Georgetown alumnus
Afraid of a big ass.
“I thought he was just another nut
otherwise I would have paid
attention.”
This hurts.
This hurts so much.
“So when should we make our next appointment?”
Later on
Making fun of America’s great grandmother
Makes her brighten and laugh
While she remembers to forget
What she did to me
Over and over
And over.
...
“Hospital”
...
Every word out of their three mouths
Is a lie.
“I know now I have courage.”
I write
And they keep me even longer.
To prove it.
--------------------------------
2 days, 3 days, 4.
Keep movin' it forward.
Don't cross off the days on any damn calender
Cuz that's one day less to live.
1 2 3 4
Much much much much more.
posted by joe sweeney at 8:36 PM
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