Why I should never read Newsweek stone cold sober and other msc msngs...

---- Portland Press Herald Letter of the Week:

From the August 30 Edition

JP of Portland writes:

"People of a liberal persuasion (I will inject various possibly humorous comments, beginning here. 'People of a liberal persuasion' is a dead giveaway that a. JP can't write too goodly b. JP hates liberals) often talk about diversity and openmindedness.

However, that is not what I sensed when I read the article on Hooters possibly coming to Portland (again, JP can't write all that good).

Jan Beitzer, executive director of the Portland Downtown District, is 'concerned about the image that Hooters has' and is 'disappointed' to see it coming to the Arts District.

Jennifer Halm-Perazone, coordinator of Portland NOW, the local chapter of the National Organization for Women, says the idea of Hooters coming to Maine is 'just icky.'

Such comments are illustrative of many in Portland who have no tolerance for ideas or institutions (Hooters is not an idea and big boobs in small tops are not instit...well, scratch that, maybe they are...) that do not fit their left-wing view of the world - think of the reactions to the proposed statues of a nuclear family at Hadlock (actually, I think it was the city government that was opposed to the statues for legal reasons, but I don't know the whole story.), development along a portion of the waterfront [or elsewhere] or any positive reference to our president (actually, if JP loves the president so much he would use a capital P when spelling President.).

Such reactions are all too often reinforced by this newspaper.

Nor would such a lack of tolerance (Allowing Hooters into the downtown equals the Freedom Riders these days to good ol' boys, apparently.) be accepted if the situation was reversed - imagine NOW's reaction if a gay bar opening in a particular neighborhood was described as 'just icky' (If that was the worst thing said by morons about Portland's gay culture, I would by okey dokey with that, JP.)

Not everyone in Portland is an artist or member of the Green Party. (This sentence is funny because I can't imagine anyone writing it with a straight face. There are a few hundred artists in a city of about 80,000 and I believe two elected members of city government belonging to the Green Party. Wow. Talk about being threatened by anything and everything, JP. You've got issues, dude.)

Some us like to drink cold barley pops (Did he mean "hops"? Or really mean to type "pops"?) And eat chicken wings and occasionally even vote for a Republican. (Ok...ok....JP remembered to capitalize Republican, but forgot to mention the ogling of big breasted women...but maybe it slipped his mind. He was on a roll there.)

The city of Portland should make room for us as well. (Like there aren't enough bars downtown already? No one is stopping you from drinking a few pops, and maybe even some beer. And actually, I think if Hooters is willing to pay their share of the property taxes and that type of stuff that they should be allowed to open up. So long as there is no legal restriction on a bar featuring big breasted, scantily clad young women, who, in all likelihood can't stand their job and hate mouth breathering customers, then go for it Hooters. But don't kid yourself. This is about business, property taxes, and big boobs. Not freedom of this or the Constitution or anything else. Big boobs and big bucks.)

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----- Newsweek Letter of the Week

MG of Yaphank, NY writes:

"Billy Graham seems like a decent and dedicated man with the humility to examine and reassess his beliefs and actions. That doesn't change the fact that he and others like him have exerted inappropriate influence on politics and government specifically precluded by the Founding Fathers. Hobnobbing with politicians, they create the impression of heavenly approval of policy. As parts of the world again collapse into wars of righteous religious rivalry, I must wonder why some Americans don't see it is vital to avoid the disaster of government by religious sect."

Couldn't have said it any better, MG. Awesome job. Any person simpleminded enough to believe that God has blessed the USA to lead the world morally has no idea of our country's history, and, more importantly, if they had been born in Pakistan or Saudi Arabia would probably be telling their neighbors how THEIR religion (Islam) was the NUMERO UNO religion on the planet. It's just accident of birth that religious nuts were born over there and not over here. And vice versa.

Or I could just be plain wrong. I won't know for (hopefully) about 45 years or so.

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Other stuff from this week's Newsweek ----

BIG story on "Hurricane Katrina: One Year Later". Most of the writing concerns Mayor Nagin, who won re-election in a landslide six months back. The funny part is that a few pages later there is a big advertising spread from, first Allstate, then a multipage insert from an insurance foundation that is supposed to "help consumers make smart insurance decisions to safeguard their families' financial futures." Why is this sidesplittingly funny? Because the insurance companies are trying to pay as little as possible to all the Katrina victims who bought either flood or hurricane insurance. This deceit is covered in Spike Lee's great HBO doc. One person is quoted as saying "there is a special place in hell" for those who work with and for catastrophic insurance providers. Is this advertising collage a coincidence? Or are the insurance companies trying to scare folks from other parts of the country into buying catastrophic coverage? I'll bet the latter.

But if I WERE a homeowner, I'd sooner spend my savings or earnings on gun turrents for the family SUV than on hurricane insurance. Ain't no way any self-respecting insurance company pays 20 cents on the dollar should a hurricane wipe out Maine or any other state.

(This post is already too long. Sorry feel free to curse me out or check out your MySpace page........N-O-W!)

---- An article on page 51 about whether John Mark Karr is guilty or not. That's the problem with a weekly versus a daily: the crappy, splashy stories can look silly upon getting to your readers.

---- The good stuff:

I'm looking forward to..

.....seeing "Borat"
.....seeing "All the King's Men"
.....reading "Justice for All: Earl Warren and the Nation He Made"
.....watching "Studio 60" and "30 Rock"

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The promised msc msngs...

---- Barry Manilow won a darned Emmy? Talk about a meaningless award show....

---- Bob Dylan's new cd is very, very good. This guy has put out a greater volume of terrific music than just about any other person I can think of.

---- "The Daily Show" has become what"Saturday Night Live" once was, way back when: The proving ground for new and gifted comedians. Jon Stewart, of course, is great, but he can't act so his career is going to remain that of an awesome fake news host. Steve Carell is now a Star with a capital S, but let's hope he doesn't go all David Caruso on us and leaves the best comedy on tv, "The Office". Remember that line from "40YOV", Steve? DON'T be like David Caruso in "Jade". Stay where you are for a while. Nothing wrong with great tv. How many millions did Jerry Seinfeld, who IMO is just an very good but not great standup comedian, make from his show? And Stephen Colbert is just great on HIS show. I was a bit surprised that his schtick could carry 22 minutes, but it sure as heckfire can! The "Colbert Report" is great tv. Now, good luck to the Corrdry brothers. And I think it is supergreatfantastic that "TDS" is embracing ethnic diversity in its staff. Don't talk the talk if ya don't walk the walk.

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edit - spelling issues...spelling issues.

Bitching about stuff...and a prayer

1) Saw a minivan with the rear window soaped with the phrase "Seriosly Seniors 2007". Seriously, you seniors will have a hard time graduating with that level of spelling.

2) Please...I beg of you....I am groveling...please, oh God, please...USE YOUR TURN SIGNALS. For the luv a' Christ, use your damn turn signal. Oh, God, PLEASE....

3) I am beginning to realize that the Stop signs in the Kohl's parking lot in Westbrook are there primarily for legal reasons. As in: when some 86 year old with hearing problems gets run over by a soccer mom in a hurry to pick up their soccer playing tykes, the store has a built in excuse: "Well, heck, Mr. Coroner/Police Officer/Reporter/Disctict Attorney. We HAD Stop signs put in place. It can't be OUR fault that no on ever stopped." Folks don't even bother to slow down at that particular Kohl's.

I guess I'm the only one in Southern Maine that stops at all stop signs. Because I see the same thing happening when I go to the York Hannaford's. There's a stop sign in their parking lot that apparently magically transforms into the phrase "Accelerate Now!" to all the soccer moms in their massive tank-like SUVs. Man, I bet they wish they could mount a sub-machine gun up there. THAT would sure clear the riff raff outta' their way, huh?

4) The BK's near the Maine Mall today served me a nice long white hair with a cheeseburger around it, as Elaine Benes would say. Can't WAIT to never eat there again. GROSSSSSSSS.

5) One question I have is: Will this be the first Red Sox team since 1997 to finish under .500? And how far has Theo Epstein's star fallen in the baseball world, now that this year can officially be termed a disaster?

5) David Ortiz, as has been said in so many places in the last few days, has been the best thing to happen to the Sox since Ted Williams. He is that good, but also he appears to be a genuinely awesome guy that is loved by his teammates. No one with any sense of the history of Boston sports is feeling good right now.

===================================

OK..so maybe it's really over....

Tonight's Red Sox lineup:

C. Crisp CF
A. Cora SS
M. Loretta DH
K. Youkilis LF
E. Hinske RF
M. Lowell 3B
J. Lopez C
C. Pena 1B
D. Pedroia 2B

Pena and Lopez and not major league caliber players at this point in their careers. And Loretta is DHing? Crisp has been a disaster aside from ONE SINGLE CATCH. Cora has had a very good season, but shouldn't be out there two days in a row. And Lowell has certainly disappeared in the second half. Wow. This is not good. I have to eat my "the RS are NOT dead" words from about a week ago. They are dead. Man, this stinks. Three years in the playoffs and a dream season two years back is enough for the baseball gods to give New England.

Now if Agassi can just finish off a third set for the first round win the night will not be a total sports writeoff......

What constitutes a "gang"?

Here's a short clip from Sunday's Portland Press Herald:

"Goffstown, N.H.

Fight among youths results in two stabbings

Two local brothers stabbed early Saturday morning apparently were involved in a fight between two feuding groups of armed youths, according to police.

The brothers, aged 21 and 19, were stabbed and the windows of their car smashed with a baseball bat.

The older brother was stabbed four times in the back and run over by a car.

The younger brother was stabbed in the chest. Both were treated at Manchester hospitals and expected to recover. Their names were not released."

=================================

Here's the full story from the Manchester Union Leader:
link

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Since the Press Herald does not have a real online archive, it's impossible for me to research their use of the word "gang" vs. "two feuding groups of armed youths". Goffstown is a largely white suburb of the most racially diverse city in NH, Manchester (ok..the only fairly racially diverse city in NH). In what way would the story have been written differently if the fight/attack happened within Manchester, or in Boston or some other large city? I don't know. I just know that the phrase "two feuding groups of armed youths" basically means "gangs". If they had said "gangs", how much ink would have been saved by reducing the language by 24 letters?

Speaking of Personal Ads.....

......this comes from an actual ad on Yahoo (yes...I look....):

"In my own words: I am an easy going person, with a good sense of humor. I am honest, hard working, and intellegent. I am very understanding and I possess a kind and charitable heart."

Sorry toots, but there aren't three e's in intelligent.

good luck with your search!!!!!

Ever read in a personal ad that "I love foreign films"???? Well, truth be told some of them are crap, just like here.

Example numero uno/#1/First Place Winner in the worst film I've seen in years:

The Child.

Winner of the Cannes Film Festival????? My God, this is a piece of garbage.

If anyone ever tells me that they love "foreign films", to show how "learned and educated" they are, I'm going to forcibly make them watch this garbage three times in one day, just to feel the pain I felt this afternoon for one hour (didn't finish the film, it was THAT awful and immoral and um....stuped!)

Thank you Spike Lee for an important piece of work

Just finished watching the 4 hour plus doc by Mr. Lee on Katrine and its aftermath, shown on HBO. Great job, great damn job. Looks at the whole situation that, to this day, is still a complete mess. There is so much blame, starting with FEMA and the entire federal government and Army Corps of Engineers, to go around that it boggles the mind.

--------------------------------------------

Here's the attitude in brief that folks from NO are dealing with:

"What I’m hearing which is sort of
scary is they all want to stay in Texas. Everyone is
so overwhelmed by the hospitality.

"And so many of the people in the arena here, you
know, were underprivileged anyway, so this--this (she
chuckles slightly) is working very well for them."

That, of course, came from the former First Lady of these United States, Barbara Bush.

Excuse me for a moment while I....

.....
.....
.....
.....
.....

Just remembering how I thought when I first saw that quote on the news. Good thing I didn't eat much today or there would be a whole lot more vomit in Apartment404. Thanks for the purge, Mrs. Bush. Hope the weekend getaway and marraige ceremonies went well for you and yours down the road in Kennnebunkport.

(Would the fucken Bush's move to Texas or Florida or someplace else already??? We all know they hate the Northeast corridor and all its....sanity (democrats and Democrats alike). Go somewhere where they buy your line of shite. Midwest or Deep South preferably.))

The single most shattering, most depressing part of the whole experience that Lee put on film is the film of the levees the Netherlands has built. Depressing because Dutch engineers are no better than US engineers. It's just that a lot of....um...poor....black folks lived in the most at risk areas of NO and the Gulf Coast. Why spend billions on them when they vote for Dems and pay less taxes (due to a multitude of socioeconomic factors that go back 400 fucken years in this great land).

"When The Levees Broke" is great filmmaking. Hopefully Lee got the bills paid via "Inside Man" and can go back to making real films like this one.

Here's a funny quote from Mark Wahlberg concerning "Rudy" vs. "Invincible"

Get real, Marky Mark. I hear that "Invincible" is a pretty entertaining movie, but this quote from the current Entertainment Weekly is amusing in its arrogance:

"Star Mark Wahlberg - who did almost all of his own stunts (aside: this idea that the star did all his own stunts has been around and recycled by Hollywood flacks since probably "Birth of a Nation"..end of aside) - says there's no sense in looking for cinematic comparisons between Invincible and movies 'like Rudy. I mean, that guy played one play because everyone liked him. This guy went in there and earned it.'"

Actually it sorta pissed me off. I know Wahlberg is promoting a movie (Entourage: "Vince, they don't pay you to act, they pay you to promote!") but does he have to diss a guy and a movie that are treasured by many many folks, including me?

Sorry, Mark, but there is a large school of thought that Rudy Ruettiger, who played for Notre Dame's practice squad until finally appearing in the final home game of his class's senior year and then sacked the other team's QB on the game's final play, is and was more of a football player than Vince Papale ever was.

The real Rudy was carried off the field by his teammates following the Georgia Tech game because they had the utmost respect for his tenacity and perseverance in the face of tremendous odds: lack of talent, mainly, but also academic struggles and the battle to stay on the field despite being pounded by players twice his size day after day. Those were the days when college squads had over a hundred players on scholarship, so even getting to wear that ND jersey for just one day was a tribute to Ruettiger from his fellow players. (Didn't happen quite like the movie claimed, but hey so what?)

In contrast....

I've read on the net that a lot of Eagles players wondered why Papale, who actually (contrary to published flack crap) HAD played high school ball and spent two seasons in the old, short lived WFL pro league of the '70's, was on the Eagles roster, which, in contrast to a college squad, was limited by the league, thus depriving a better player of a salary. Papale played in parts of games for three seasons on special teams and wide receiver and had a grand career total of ONE CATCH for 15 damn yards.

Rudy, the real one, played one game and had a sack on his one and only play. And it was no gift: the GTech lineman just goofed and left him alone to get in scotfree. I've seen the tape.

Whose career would you rather have: Rudy's/"Rudy", which brings tears to manly mens eyes whenever the movie is shown, or Vince Papale's, who was kind of a joke to his teammates for three years and made one significant play while appearing in over 40 games in his three year career?

I'll take "Rudy"...and Rudy....anyday.

Florida Rep. Katherine Harris is....not....too....smart. But quite dangerous.

Why do all, or most, of the moronic, ultra religious Congressmen and women come from the South? Are some stereotypes sort of deserved? I'm not sure. I just know that Rep. Harris is b-t---t insane, yet was elected to Congress as a Republican from Florida. Big shock.

In a recent "Vanity Fair" article on the Defense Department scandals, there was a quote that Rep. Harris was "so incompetent she can't be bribed."

Now she wants to do away with the separation of church and state. (see here) Wow. For over two centuries, things worked pretty well WITH that separation, but I guess the Bush cabal can always find ways to..um...improve things.

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Edit: 8/27/06

Here's the controversial interview Rep. Harris had with Florida Baptist Witness.

Fun quotes from her interview:

"I had a godly family (growing up)."

"The Bible says we are to be salt and light. And salt and light means not just in the church and not just as a teacher or as a pastor or a banker or a lawyer, but in government and we have to have elected officials in government and we have to have the faithful in government and over time, that lie we have been told, the separation of church and state, people have internalized, thinking that they needed to avoid politics and that is so wrong because God is the one who chooses our rulers. And if we are the ones not actively involved in electing those godly men and women and if people aren’t involved in helping godly men in getting elected than we’re going to have a nation of secular laws. That’s not what our founding fathers intended and that’s certainly isn’t what God intended. So it’s really important that members of the church know people’s stands. It’s really important that they get involved in campaigns. I said I’m going to run a campaign of integrity. I’m not going to run it like all of the campaigns that I’ve seen before…. And you know, it’s hard to find people that are gonna behave that way in a campaign and be honorable that way in a campaign. But that’s why we need the faithful and we need to take back this country. It’s time that the churches get involved. Pastors, from the pulpit, can invite people to speak, not on politics, but of their faith. But they can discern, they can ask those people running for election, in the pulpit, what is your position on gay marriage? What is your position on abortion? That is totally permissible in 5013C organizations. They simply cannot endorse from the pulpit. And that’s why I’ve gone to churches and I’ve spoken in four churches, five churches a day on Sunday and people line up afterwards because it’s so important that they know. And if we don’t get involved as Christians then how could we possibly take this back?" - Take BACK this country?? Who the heckfire runs every branch of the federal government? Certainly not the Moonies.

"I have not supported gay marriage and I do not support any civil rights actions with regard to homosexuality." - More hatred for homos. Thanks Christians!!

"But the real issue is why should Baptists care, why should people care? If you are not electing Christians, tried and true, under public scrutiny and pressure, if you’re not electing Christians then in essence you are going to legislate sin. They can legislate sin. They can say that abortion is alright. They can vote to sustain gay marriage. And that will take western civilization, indeed other nations because people look to our country as one nation as under God and whenever we legislate sin and we say abortion is permissible and we say gay unions are permissible, then average citizens who are not Christians, because they don’t know better, we are leading them astray and it’s wrong. ..." - Christians KNOW BETTER than others. What a moron Harris is. Even someone as dumb as athiestic me knows that.

Hope you go down in flames in the upcoming election, Rep. Harris. You and your hatred for non-Christians, non-whites, whomever doesn't look and act like you. And thanks again for the last six years of President Bush.

Three strikes and I'm out....

Strike One -

Betcha the Portsmouth Little League "coach" is pissed he forgot to slap a kid around, like the other coach did in the LLWS (too lazy to look for a link, but it happened). Would have made for the "Gordie Howe Hat-Trick": punch a kid, throw a game to win on forfeit, and walk (TWICE) a kid intentionally in a LITTLE LEAGUE game. What a role model!!!!!!

The Little League World Series has officially become a trash sport. Like "Battle of the Network Stars". Let me explain:

I could forgive the Taiwanese team with the receding hairlines. I could forgive the 14 year old pitcher from the Bronx who was supposed to be so A-W-E-S-O-M-E (drafted in...like....the 350th round in this year's MLB draft). I could forget the constant spitting by kids who had nothing to spit (note to LL'ers: tobacco juice must be spit out lest it cause a massive vomiting attack. Gum juice does NOT have to be spit out.) I loved the Burroughs kid, Cody Webster and the future hockey player leading their towns to world championships. But hey, enough is enough.

This year: 1) Harold Reynolds, the voice of the LLWS, was tossed by ESPN for serial sexual harrassment. 2) a coach slapped a player across the face during a game. 3) a newspaper writer suggested in all seriousness that the LLers get paid. G-E-T- P-A-I-D (again, too lazy/tired to look for the link, but it happened. maybe on deadspin is a link...). 4) the saga of Portsmouth NH...not exactly bringing honor to the state or the game.

I have watched not one single second of this trash sport of a tournament, instead following the media accounts. Maybe they could get a Cosell imitator to announce the finals. I'm sure something embarrassing will happen. Just as Cosell would have wanted.

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Strike Two -

Does Globo-Mart focus their hiring on ex-bank tellers? Or do ex-Globo-Mart employees tend to work as bank tellers in their next job(s)?

The wonderfulness, the shear joy of entering both establishments leads me to believe there is some sort of synergistic relationship going on there. Just an opinion.

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Strike Three -

Deion Branch is CLEARLY in the wrong in holding out with the Pats. He is in the last year of his rookie five year contract. Some teams are willing to renegotiate during a player's contract year, preseason. For a franchise guy like Seymour or Brady, making them happy makes perfect sense. For a very good, but hardly irreplaceable wide receiver like Branch, former Super MVP, it's maybe not a good option depending on how much he wants and how hard he is to replace. I don't think the Pats won/loss record would be more than a game or perhaps two different without Branch. That may be the difference between the club making the playoffs and staying home, but the point is that the guy signed a contract, has performed well but is no Jerry Rice, and will be rewarded after the season with a sweet deal. I, Mr. Lefitst, support BB and Pats management. Branch is supposed to make more than a mill this season. Not much if he was a backup catcher on the Yankees or something, but different sports have different salary structures. In the NFL, thanks to Bryant Gumbel's main squeeze Gene Upshaw, the salary structure says that Deion is worth what he signed for. Gumbel was RIGHT: Upshaw has given the NFL Players union the short end of the stick, but thems the cardz to be played right now for Deion Branch. If he has a big year, then he gets the big money. The longer he sits out, the more likely he is to have a crappy year and sign for crappy short term money and a tiny (the only guaranteed bucks in the league) signing bonus.

Get to camp, Deion! It's for the best all the way around.

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Ball Four -

It seems the entire state of Maine's highway system is under construction.

Then why, in He Who Has No Name's Name, is exit 15 on 295 Southbound not getting a friggin onramp? I simply can't believe there aren't a dozen accidents a month up there. I used to have to go to Yarmouth a couple times a week, and always avoided this onramp. Because. There. Is. No. On. Ramp. Fer Chris' sakes.

There IZ no onramp on exit 15 southbound on 295. It's a complete crapshoot as to whether you should stop, and get rearended by cars behind you, or continue and try to merge in the 18 inches they give you, and risk getting run over by a semi, driven by that dude up north who was, as I remember, on crack, speed, booze, downers, Pepsi, antidepressants, Tums and whatever the fudge else he could get his hands on.

Give Yarmouth an onramp. For the love of what's-his-name.

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G-Nite

Friends don't call friends "macaca": Senator George Allen

Old story, but still worth a looksee on YouTube for the sheer brazenness of the Republican Senator's putdown of an American citizen of somewhat dark skin (the dude was born and raised in PA, USA, by the way). Follow the links on the bottom on the Wik page for YouTube footage.

Macaca is a word I had never heard before this whole thing broke. So obviously the Senator is up on all the finer points of racial epithets. Good for him. Makes it easier to feel like vomiting when Republicans promote him as a possible successor to our current President.

Here's the ABC News clip which quotes Allen's camp as apologizing to "anyone who was possibly offended" by the remark. Anyone? You mean there are people who might possibly NOT be offended by this guy sticking his foot into his big fat mouth? So he's apologizing to six billion people for being a cretin? Ok, that makes sense.

For a fucken Senator to be so brazen, so open for using a word that carries the same message as "nigger" to a black man shows one of two things:

------ He is so stupid he didn't realize what he was saying. ...Possible but not likely.

------ He showed how he really feels about non-white folks, both here and in the world. ...More likely.

Our local paper put an article on yet another Senator, Mr. Burns of Montanta, a Republican trying to keep his eyes open during some farm type meeting, and the headline was "YouTube shows 'gotcha' politics". That, to my eyes, is being kind to these jerks. If someone says "macaca" to a guy with a video camera or falls asleep at open state farm bill hearing, the public deserves to know. It's not a "gotcha", it's public information.....so long as they don't stick a camera in the guy's house or something.

Maybe they should just be honest and adopt this creed:

"The Republican Party: Same Old Shite...Different Wrapper. Go For It In '06!!!"

Portsmouth NH Little League: Non-class personified

Well, the Portsmouth Little League saga has come to an end. They lost in the US semifinals last night.

Apparently the NH "coach" ordered his pitcher to INTENTIONALLY WALK one of the opposing players to get to someone he thought was an easier out. What great leadership.

Of course, the kid smacked a double or something to win the game for the other team. Justice!

Hopefully the sad, embarrassing story of Portsmouth LL 2006 will be forgotten quickly.

Childhood memories turn to adult nightmares with "coaches" like these to develop young people.

Dear President Bush: Just a reminder...43 years later, and still true.

Masters of War: by Bob Dylan
--------------------------

Come you masters of war
You that build all the guns
You that build the death planes
You that build the big bombs
You that hide behind walls
You that hide behind desks
I just want you to know
I can see through your masks

You that never done nothin'
But build to destroy
You play with my world
Like it's your little toy
You put a gun in my hand
And you hide from my eyes
And you turn and run farther
When the fast bullets fly

Like Judas of old
You lie and deceive
A world war can be won
You want me to believe
But I see through your eyes
And I see through your brain
Like I see through the water
That runs down my drain

You fasten the triggers
For the others to fire
Then you set back and watch
When the death count gets higher
You hide in your mansion
As young people's blood
Flows out of their bodies
And is buried in the mud

You've thrown the worst fear
That can ever be hurled
Fear to bring children
Into the world
For threatening my baby
Unborn and unnamed
You ain't worth the blood
That runs in your veins

How much do I know
To talk out of turn
You might say that I'm young
You might say I'm unlearned
But there's one thing I know
Though I'm younger than you
Even Jesus would never
Forgive what you do

Let me ask you one question
Is your money that good
Will it buy you forgiveness
Do you think that it could
I think you will find
When your death takes its toll
All the money you made
Will never buy back your soul

And I hope that you die
And your death'll come soon
I will follow your casket
In the pale afternoon
And I'll watch while you're lowered
Down to your deathbed
And I'll stand o'er your grave
'Til I'm sure that you're dead

Copyright © 1963; renewed 1991 Special Rider Music

Link to my new blog...

...though I don't expect many posts.

click right here

yes, one hundred smackers for a photo of bush on a horse. shouldn't be too much too ask for of a real Texican, should it?

Youth Sports "Coaches": Snakes on a Plain

Continuing on with the theme from last night's post, which described the debacle that allowed Portsmouth, NH to have a chance to advance to the LL World Series...

Several years back I had a brief but illuminating conversation with the father of a young athlete here in Portland. It occurred at a volunteer job I held for...oh....about two weeks (but that's another story). The father was going on about how our young needed to be taught that "only the strong survive" and "hard work leads to results" and other such superficial tap. I had to ask him where he was going with this and he said that his son was playing baseball at the highest levels of Portland youth sports (the fact that there have been only a handful of pro athletes from the great state of Maine means nothing to deluded parents). I discerned that his son had been part of a draft for his Little League or Babe Ruth group (I forget which). These drafts are so foul to my eyes that I simply had to ask him how he felt about children as young as 9 or 10 being traded like pieces of meat and once again he went on about how kids need to be tough. And that (Oh, thank God for this) thankfully his son was talented and one of the higher picks.

Now I have, and have always had, less athletic ability than anyone else interested in these things that I know of. I was cut from my freshman basketball team in high school and never tried out again. There are other tales of woe that I will not include in order to prevent my complete embarrassment. So I am coming from the other side of the equation: the kid who gets cut, the kid who gets picked last or close to it. When I played badminton with two "friends" when I was about 12 they referred to me as "the handicap" since whosever side I played on seemed to lose, as I ......sucked.

Anyway, I sort of confronted this proud papa, contending that ultra competitive drafts and youth leagues do more to hurt our nation's younsters in their athletic development than help. Both in terms of performance and, most especially in my eyes, enjoyment by the kids.

Let's take a quick look at some of the USA's greatest athletes:

Bill Russell: The greatest team sport athlete in America's glorious history, barely played in high school. It was only at an All Star game post senior year that the coach of the University of San Francisco noticed a 6-8 kid with some quickness and shotblocking ability. Otherwise, Russell would have worked in a factory. The rest is history: 2 NCAA championships, 1 Olympic gold medal, and more NBA rings than fingers (11 out of 13, woulda been 12 if not for a sprained ankle).

Bob Cousy, one of the five greatest point guards and known as "Mr. Basketball" during his wonderful career: Did not make his high school varsity until a senior. Was not even wanted by Red Auerbach following a great career at Holy Cross.

More recently?

How about Michael Jordan? Didn't become a national name until he was 17, following his junior year in high school, at a University of North Carolina camp where he was noticed by one of Dean Smith's assistants. Again, the rest is history.

Pat Ewing and Hakeen Abdul Olajuwon: both grew up in poor nations (Jamaica and Nigeria) playing youth soccer in anonymity. Ewing moved to Cambridge, MA at about 10 and The Dream arrived at the University of Houston as a freshman. Both were NOT subject to AAU ball and the summertime meatmarket which has been, IMO, largely the reason the US has lost its formerly wide competitive advantage over the rest of the world. While players in Europe and South America are working on skills (like shooting a midrange jumper!!), American players are trying to get on ESPN's Streetball crap shows. That is NOT competitive basketball, that is showtime (small s).

DWade, Carmelo and King James: James has been a national name since he was a soph in hs. Melo has been huge for a while as well. Wade? A top notch recruit for Marquette, but not considered in the class of the top players coming out of high school. And now who has the ring? Wade. Melo has the Final Four wins. And James? Not so much. Not to criticize the King because he plays for the Cavs, but they have a lot of work to do before competing for a title. And Drew Gooden ain't gonna be starting on a championship team, IMO (aside there). Just shows you that Wade's maturity can in part be attributed to NOT being a big name when he was 15.

Returning to that Portland parent, he worked at a social services job that probably paid him less than $40K a year. Now if you're of the mindset that "only the strong survive", should you really be manning a help line for homeless, mentally ill, immigrants, etc? And if "winning is all that matters", does $40K a year say a lot for your ability to win? I would think that most halfway intelligent folk who think money is the be all and end all (not saying he felt this way) would be embarrassed to be making 40k per annum.

Wonder how his son is doing now, five or six years later? High school varsity? Maybe. Maybe not. College scholarship? Perhaps.

Memories that will last a lifetime? Certainly.

"I'm a Star, a Star...a bright shining Star"....the Great Sam Bam...."World Trade Center"= grade A flick....etc.

1) Little League....Oh what a feelin': Portsmouth, NH gets into World Series, helped by a DQ "Win" over Vermont.

Vermont forgot to use one of its players and the NH "Coaches" caught it after NH fell behind in the last inning. So both teams were "coached" to try to lengthen/shorten the game. What a farce. Writers are criticizing the rule responsible for this joke. Rule? No....it's the "Coaches" of 11 and 12 year olds who instill in normal children the "win at all costs" mindset that gets 0.000001 percent of them into professional careers of indeterminate lengths.

And that "waac" attitude by youth "coaches" and parents is likely the main reason that the majority of teenagers give up competitive sports when they realize they won't make high school varsity teams.


2) saw the "Boogie Nights" DVD the other night....

....And still consider the 1997 release one of the great films of the last 15 years. Paul Thomas Anderson is supposed to be quite the handful to work with and for, but he certainly has made some outstanding films: "Hard Eight", "Boogie Nights", "Magnolia" and even the strangely fascinating "Punch-Drunk Love".

Who but Mark Wahlberg could play Eddie Adams/Dirk Diggler/Brock Landers? Great choice of a then inexperienced Wahlberg by PTA. And John C. Reilly's gag reel is hilarious. This is a guy who needs to do more comedy (see "Talladega Nights").

PTA is working on a new film, a period piece that will be a new experience for him. Looking forward to "There will be Blood". And you know the music will be great. That's always a given with PTA's films.


3) Received "Turning of the Tide" in the mail today: a new book about the famous 1970 college football clash between an integrated and awesomely talented USC team and Bear Bryant's all white "Bama squad. The reason it hits home for me, partly, is the role played by the greatest Patriot running back of all: Sam "Bam" Cunningham. He ran roughshod over (and over and over) the tough but overmatched Alabama defense in 'SC's 42-21 victory. Cunningham is still a legend down South, as the opening chapter describes his return in 2003 to watch a USC-Auburn game. He was treated as a conquering hero by the taxi driver when Cunningham's friend told the driver he was carrying football royalty: a tour of Montgomery, where middle aged and older blacks told him how much that one game meant to them and their state. The same thing happened at his restaurant and hotel.

Pats fans remember Sam Bam's nine years with fondness. Despite being a West Coast guy through and through, Cunningham was a loyal Patriot through some thin and some fat years in Foxboro. No Super Bowls, but a legacy of class and greatness.

Looking forward to devouring what should be a tasty meal of a book...


4) Saw "World Trade Center" today. Terrific film.

Oliver Stone even had a couple of Marines come to the rescue of the trapped Port Authority cops. Marines. Guess he is over the whole "4th of July"/"Platoon"/"JFK" deal. Good to see him make a basic movie movie. No conspiracy stuff. Just an entertaining, moving flick that I recommend highly. And he even got a good performance out of Nic Cage, who seems to have jumped the shark (do I use that phrase a tad too often?) with his revolving marraiges and strange choice of roles (that mandolin film, the car thief one, etc.).

Definately a multiple hankie movie for both her and him.


5) Repeat after me: "The Red Sox are not dead....the Red Sox are not dead...the Red Sox are not dead."

Something good has to happen. It just has to. No way am I going to my grave with only one World Series Championship t-shirt on. I want multiple t's!

I always say that a baseball team is never as good as they look during a streak, good or bad. With about six weeks left in the regular season, there is still time for the pitching to somewhat right itself, though how Timlin, Beckett and others are going to regain or even gain a groove...I don't know. But Theo and John Henry bought themselves a lot of leeway with the 04 title, and deserve our support.


6) The most beautiful weather of the year awaits us. Take comfort in that, even if the Sox do sink.

The next two months; from mid August until mid October, see the most 65 to 80 degree, sunshiny days of the year. Time to drink it in if you can.

"Buzzkill, baby, buzzkill!"

1) In a post several weeks back I suggested that Wiscasset, ME change its name to "Blocked Colon, ME." Well, a new idea has struck me. Why not call the town "Buzzkill"? As in thousands of tourists saying to each other on the long journey up from Boston, NY, Connecticut, etc.: "I can't WAIT to get to _________, but first we gotta get through Buzzkill.....That damn bridge traffic at Buzzkill gets me every time.....What a......buzz killer!" Yeah, I think that would make a lot more sense than "The Prettiest Parking Lot in Maine (Member of National Register of Historic Parking Lots since 1973)". Don't you? Or am I wicked wrong?

2) Another thing about the bridge traffic at Buzzkill: I love it that so many SUVs and pickups have those "Motorcycles are Everywhere" bumper stickers on 'em. It is important to remember that cyclists are out there and harder to see than, say a minivan. True, true.

For example, Steelers QB Ben (Eyechart) was doing not a thing wrong when he was blindsided by that woman from Maine..except he wasn't wearing a helmet. His choice, in Pennsylvania and a lot of other states. But what really ground my gears...what really toasted my bagel this afternoon was some biker who felt that because he was on a cycle the traffic rules didn't apply to him. He pulled into the breakdown lane about two miles north of the Wiscasset bridge and kept on truckin'. I lost track of him, but I'm sure his little manuever saved him about 30m, and royally pissed off me and just about every other 4 wheel vehicle that COULDN'T follow his (illegal) path. Sorry, but it is a jerk move to pull your bike into the breakdown lane and then merge back into traffic 1/5/hundreds of miles up ahead. If I'm wrong, then again I apologize. But I can't see how anyone could rationally justify bikes being allowed to pull this kinda crap.

3) Bob Dylan's autobiography, "Chronicles Volume I", which came out 2 years ago, is a MUST read. One of the very best autobiographies I have ever laid eyes on. Doesn't follow a linear path at all. No "I grew up a poor white child in Hibbing" for Dylan. The book has about a half dozen chapters, each describing a different period of Dylan's musical life. He is obviously incredibly intelligent and well read, but many times this does not make for a great read. "Chronicles" is the exception. Highly recommended.

4) Watching a tape of Letterman's show from Tuesday or Wednesday, I realized that male fantasies can often be based purely on a bunch of crap. Just because a woman is unspeakably beautiful does not mean I would want to spend much time with her. Well, probably not anyway.

For example, Jessica Biel was Dave's guest. And her 10 or so minutes seemed like 30. I know she is young (mid 20's) but she, first off, was dressed all wrong. With her cheekbones being one of the great womanly features on this earth, what the hell was she doing with her bangs dragging down to the edge of her lips? (Sorry to go all Queer Eye there, but hey!) And you think she could have come up with a funny story for Letterman and his audience of a couple million. Jesus, time passed s-l-o-w-l-y.

But of course she is georgeous, so all is forgiven, I guess.

5) Whatever real estate agent put the fish restaurant next to the exterminator on Pleasant Street in Brunswick has some 'splainin ta do. What the hell kind of a moron would eat fish next to a place with enough insecticide to kill off half of New England? Not serving your clients, Mr. or Ms. real estate agent. Man, talk about buzzkill. No way I ever eat THERE.

6) This guy is just about the biggest jerkoff in the country. Great article on him in Vanity Fair that I finally got around to reading. You think the media in his district would have sensed something wrong when the guy was driving a Rolls, living in a multi million dollar home, and owning a boat named "Duke-Stir"? What the hell were the newspapermen doing while all this was going on?

Another example of the incredible laziness of the mass media, especially the newspapermen, since we all know that tv guys are the ones who can't write (hey, I watch "Man Bites Dog").

7) Did the Red Sox radio men jump the shark this afternoon during the first Yankee game when they had the five year old Jimmy Fund patient on and, when they asked the kid his favorite player he said "Johnny Damon"? Or was it during the NESN pregame show when Billy Ray Cyrus (yes THE BRC) came on wearing a Red Sox hat and talking about....something. I turned the sound down immediately. What the hell does that hick have to do with Sox/MFYs? I just don't know.

8) Incredible show on the History Channel: The Miracle of Stairway B. Just incredible.

Odds 'N Ends on a Thursday Night

from this week's Sports Illustrated...

1) Sal Fasano...my favorite MFY.

According to SI's 8/21/06 issues "Pop Culture Grid", Fasano's most prized possession is his "shrine of Chicago Bears memorabilia", the most expensive pair of shoes he's bought is a $120 pair of "work boots", the "Fan club I'd like to be the president of" is "The Hanson Brothers" (of "Slap Shot" fame), and his favorite LOVE song is "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" by Poison. Awesome! Now this is a regular G-U-Y. And I thought he was just a journeyman catcher with a .224 career average. He's much more....a real DUDE....with a .224 average. How can you not like a guy who loves the Hansons?

(Hope he gets the chance to lower that average a point or two this weekend....)

2) New NFL Commish Roger Goodell is married to a Fox "News" Anchor....

That would be Jane Skinner. Somehow I do not see the league's nickname of the "No Fun League" changing with a guy who marries into Roger Ailes cabal.

3) The Arizona Cardinals could turn into a monster of a team....

....if their owner didn't continue to be penny pinching Bill Bidwell. The have an INCREDIBLE new stadium which should significantly boost revenues and attendance, signed free agent The Edge, have 2 great receivers in Fitzgerald and Boldin, and due to their new dome will likely not wilt in the heat during the second half of the season. But still...Bidwell....Bidwell....Bidwell. He continues to own the team, and his son Michael "runs" it. With the NFC champion Seahawks about the only team that looks very strong in that conference the Cardinals could easily win 9/10 games and make the playoffs, despite a lack of depth. But I have a feeling their owner, whose club is STILL about $12m under the NFL's salary cap, will screw it up.

4) SI ran a feature on other pro athletes besides Phoenix Suns announcer Eddie Johnson who have names similar to other jocks.

Like Greg and Gregg Olson. Cute little line from Gregg about signing autographs on Greg's baseball card. Awwww.

Also "Hot Plate" and "Hot Rod" Williams. One weighed about 350 on retiring (guess which one), the other was a not-so-bright participant in a point shaving scandal at Tulane University.

Now we're getting closer to the Eddie Johnson(s) situation. Kudos to Chicago's EJ for being quoted lashing out at those quick to assume he was a child molester: "The thing that disappointed me the most is some people were overzealous enough to think it was me and attack me with a ferocity I can't comprehend."

EJ: thanks for speaking out, but it's not too hard to hard to "understand" the "ferocity". Johnson is black. The folks/media criticizing him were white...and lazy. No mystery.

Compare that with the three Jason/Jayson Williams who have played or are currently playing in the NBA. Jason is a point guard for the Heat, is white, and has had some legal run ins during his life. Jayson is a former Net charged with manslaughter in an ugly shooting death a few years back. And the former Jason, now Jay, was a Duke All-American, drafted by the Bulls who injured himself terribly two years ago in a motorcycle wreck. Seems at though the media has a very easy time keeping these three straight. Is it because one is white? And one of the black guys went to Duke? I don't know.

"You made a woman meow??": Bruno Kirby dies of leukemia.

Bruno Kirby, whose real name is way toooo long for me to recreate, was a great character actor whose career spanned from the 1972 pilot of "M*A*S*H" to a recent episode of "Entourage", where he played the infantile (make believe) producer of such fare as "Shrek" Phil Rubenstein.

In between, Kirby was a supporting star in such classics as "Donnie Brasco", "When Harry Met Sally", "City Slickers", "The Freshman", "Good Morning, Vietnam", "Tin Men", "This Is Spinal Tap", tv's groundbreaking "Hill Street Blues", "Modern Romance", and such 70's television fare as "Room 222", "Emergency" (was there ever a REAL emergency on this crappy but lovable show? always a cat in a tree.), "Columbo", "Delvecchio", and an uncredited role as, and I quote IMDB: "man greasing up his fist in club" in Freidkin's disaster of a gay nightclub/cop movie starring Pacino, "Cruising".

And of course.

The piece de resistance. A young, portly but not yet obese Clemenza. The man who introduces the future Godfather to a life of crime. A piece of cinema history in "The Godfather Part II".

Just as the recent deaths of great actors Jack Warden and Paul Gleason saddened me, the news of Kirby's passing at the age of 57 is as much a blow. For some reason, it is difficult to relate to the biggest stars, such as Redford, Eastwood, and Newman. They are, to my eyes, a bit godlike. It is, though, the character actors that I can relate and feel a bit of kinship to.

And Kirby, though he pined to be a leading man, was a great character actor.

A great actor, period.

Yes..EVEN MORE SPORTS....

1) Curt Schilling would have been Kevin McHale, Yaz, Cooz, or Espo had he spent his great career entirely in Beantown. Not quite in the top four of Russ, Orr, Ted and Bird, but close.

Tonight, as I write this, he has given up 2 runs in 7 innings on guts and a decent fastball. Just struck out the side after giving up a two run "double" (bloody m****rf****g piece of crap blooper) by Sean Casey, the weakest hitting .300 hitter in MLB. Curt Schilling has huge ones. HUGE ones.

The man gave up a year on the field for just a chance (JUST A CHANCE) at a ring in 2004. He didn't give up any bucks, but at this point a bright guy like Schilling is all about rings and pride. The pride was taken care of with the big salary the Sox paid him when they traded for him after the 2003 season (thanks Theo!). The rings were taken care of in the greatest thrill ride in MLB history, otherwise known as the 04 postseason. Remember, Schilling got his ankle stitched up with the full awareness that he would have major problems the following season, possibly even giving up the whole year. Last year, Curt won 8 games with an ERA of 5.69. Say he asked out of the 04 postseason (I know, an impossibility, but Wilt did something like that a looooong time ago for health reasons) and he would have won, most likely, another 10 games in 05, giving him 216 wins to date. He claims he will retire after next season and certainly there is no reason to doubt him. He's got two rings to date (3 WS), plenty of money, and the rep of being one of the great money pitchers in modern history. But if Schilling was to get close to 240 wins, he'd be a cinch second or third ballot HOFer. Not so sure about that now, but his place in Boston sports history is secure regardless what happens between now and Octoboer 07: BIG ONES!!!!!

(did JAVY LOPEZ just pinch hit for GONZO? ARE YOU FUCKEN KIDDING ME? IS BOB BAILEY NOT AVAILABLE? JESUS CHRIST, what a stupid move.)

----------------------------------------------

2) Totally Out-of-Nowhere Ron Ron Comment

Ron Artest is not a bright guy. To say he is not so bright is to discredit not so bright guys everywhere. I think I have said in the past that Ron Ron is just...well...as I say...not bright.

He apparently is a good hearted dude. Who else but Ron Ron would, while making several million dollars a year, try to get a pt gig at Circuit City so he could take advantage of the employee discount to buy shit for his buds? This is the mentality of Ron Ron. He is....um.....not so bright. For him to spend two years (four semesters) at St. Johns U. in NYC is a bit of a joke. He wasn't good enough to declare out of high school, and somehow made the grades and ACT/SAT's, but damn, man, listening to an interview with him is very unpleasant. He just ain't all there.

And for the great, great Larry Bird to have faith in Ron Ron to NOT explode last year stinks of desperation. Bird is a genius at spotting and molding talent. Artest is a brilliant talent. Just, as I say, not too bright. To think Ron Ron can make it through an entire NBA season, while he is supporting half of his blood relatives (check it out, he signs more paychecks than Hannaford's), without an explosion or implosion is ridiculous.

Chris Webber used to bitch how boring Sac town was. Well, with Artest in the city for a season I'll bet the joint is gonna be jumpin'.

And that is bad news for the Kings. Best of luck, though, to a good guy with a hair trigger. I can relate.


(Leyland just pitched to Big Papi not because it was the percentage move, but to show his team and pitcher he thought they had the SACK to get it done. Bad move short term, great move long term. The Tigers are in barring a 20 game losing streak. And Leyland, the best manager in the game, made a terrific move letting that smooth lefty pitch to Ortiz, win or lose. Best manager in MLB: Jim Leyland.)

(I say again: did Tito really pinch hit fucken Lopez for Gonzo? Stupidest move of the year [to date])

3) Is that enough sports talk?

Even MORE Sports: Eddie Johnson(s), The Racial Angle (From a 40 year old white male)

Most sports fans are aware now that Eddie Johnson, a 6-1 or so point guard who played at Auburn in the 70's and mostly with Atlanta in a fairly long NBA career, has been charged with sexually molesting a young girl.

There is another Eddie Johnson, 6-7, of Chicago, the U of Illinois, and a longtime NBA standout at the 2/3 spots, who has been in the news for basically (IMO) being a black guy named Johnson. They all look alike to the Chicago Tribune (apology for fingering the wrong black dude here). THIS Eddie Johnson is one of the most respected ex-NBAers around, from what I gather. Does some broadcasting, some PR, whatever, to make a buck and do some good at the same time, while assumedly living off his pension and many millions earned in The League. The Trib couldn't wait to put it to the black dude they ASSUMED was the only Eddie Johnson ever to play in the god damn NBA. Well, shiiiiiiiiiiit. Chicago ain't got nothin' on Beantown for racial profiling.

Any NBA fan from the 70's on asked themselves ONE question when reading the headline a few days back that (paraphrasing) said "Eddie Johnson arrested for sexual molestation of a young girl". And that question was WHICH Eddie Johnson is it? The one from the South ("Fast Eddie") or the one from Chicago (the man could SHOOT)? The 20 something staffers (hopefully) at the Trib jumped in with both feet, assuming there couldn't be TWO black/colored/negro dudes named "Eddie Johnson" with longtime NBA careers. No way. Would be too much of a coincidence. Like having two tall black guys named "Cliff Robinson" having long careers in The League: couldn't happen! Well: #1 and #2.

Fuck you very much, Chicago Tribune. You have done a great disservice to both journalism and the false hope that all black people DON'T look alike to white copy editors. An apology? Man, you owe more than that.

MORE Sports: State of the Sox after last night's drubbing from the Tigers

1) Now it can be said, following the 7-4 Tigers win that could have been about 12-4 easily: The Tigers are the best team in baseball, and are the favorites for the World Series. They were stealing bases, playing defense, getting good pitching....all the things that a team needs OTHER than the stable full of stud pitchers and hitters that we know they already have. Thank God they have a crappy closer in Todd Jones or they might win 110 games and not lose once in the playoffs.

When Nate Robertson has an 11-8 record and a sub 4.00 ERA at this stage of the season, your pitching is good, since he is their 4th or 5th starter. Jeremy Bonderman, who is young and has great stuff, throws for Detroit tonight. If Big Schill ever had a time to come up big, tonight and his Yankees start is the time. Not that he hasn't carried the starters. Beckett (5.02 ERA!!!) has been worse than Derek Lowe (3.97 ERA) this season, and no I don't care about the wins. It's runs allowed that matter, not how many 8-7 games you "win". What is going on with the Sox #2? He isnt even average most starts. Does he need a week off? They almost certainlyl can't give it to him, with the Yanks, Sox, Chicago, Minnesota and Detroit going for three spots, with the Tigers practically guaranteed one of them. And of course Lester has regressed since his first three starts. What is going on there? He walks folks, but why is a rookie getting worse not better? Is it the pitch calling? The coaching (Wallace is finally back so Nipper can go back to jogging with Clemens or whatever Nipper does)? Theo has to answer for Clement, Wells, Seanez, Tavarez all regressing from seasons pre Boston and what they've produced. It does seem to be a pattern, as has been mentioned at BaseballProspectus.com and other sites.

I am happy, though, for Detroit as a baseball town. Like Cincinnati, Kansas City and some others the fans there were used to seeing quality baseball before the big market teams (and it's not like Detroit isn't a big market, Mr. Tigers Owner) like Boston and New York took over the leagues. Maybe it would be for the best to have a historic franchise win it all this year...?

Hell no. On second thought I hope Bonderman and Zumaya have arm problems, Dmitri Young goes AWOL, and Pudge acts/hits his age. Go Red Sox! The season is not lost!

2) DeMarco Hale as a third base coach.

Sure it was stupid so send Manny (Manny? On a close play at the plate? My God, my heart was in my throat..) when the score was 7-4. Bases loaded and one out is better than two on, two out for the Sox hottest hitter in Wily Mo Pena. Manny's run meant zilch, it was the guy at first who needed to score for anything to matter, despite it being the eighth inning. That, hopefully, was just a complete and total brain cramp by someone who has thankfully stayed under the radar all season. And that is a good thing: Wave Em In Wendall and others were bad enough. Those third base coaches need to keep a low profile: that means they are doing their job.

One stupid, stupid decision should not ruin what has been a decent season out there for Hale.

================================

One final note to Theo and Tito:

DON'T
FUCKEN
PITCH
TAVAREZ
OR
SEANEZ
EVER
EVER
AGAIN
IN
A
RED
SOX
UNIFORM.
Pawtucket, if they accept: fine. BUT NOT BOSTON. They are human blowtorches. The season is in the homestretch. As off as Hansen and sometimes Timlin are pitch 'em till their arms fall offs. NO MORE RUDY OR JULIAN!!!!!

I have about 21 hours before I have to be somewhere...anywhere...so I'm gonna blog my ass off!

More Sports....(Skip it if ya don't care)

1) Hughes v. Coach Higgins: Ok, I've been thinking about last night's post about Kansas State's decision to rescind the scholarship for reserve center Tyler Hughes, who can be found on the Sex Offenders List for the state of Kansas. Here is the listing with some stuff I have deleted for Hughes privacy:

HUGHES, TYLER XXXX
SEX OFFENDER
Last Known Address as of: 7/25/2006
(Street Address)
MANHATTAN, KS 66XXX
County: RILEY
Race/Sex: W / M
Date of Birth: X/XX/1984
Registered Since: 5/25/2006
Offense: AGGRAVATED INDECENT LIBERTIES W/CHILD

Now this is KANSAS we iz talkin' 'bout, so "Aggravated Indecent Liberties w/Child"...well, WTF does that mean? How old is a "Child"? Up to 16, possibly? Did he have consensual sex with his underage girlfriend while he was 17? And then her father got pissed and had him charged and convicted? Maybe.

There is also the possibility that Hughes really did do something awful to a "Child", something unspeakably cruel....but I really really doubt it, with only my intuition and some common sense applied to what I know so far.

Don't you think that if he molested a young child that he would have been in juvenile detention for some period of time? Don't you think that if he was of age at the time of the crime he woulda been sent to PRISON? And that the Kansas State coaches would have known about this when their recruiting letters were routed to either Kansas Juvenile Detention Center or Kansas State Prison? And that they would have stopped recruiting him right then 'n there? Doesn't that make sense? If I'm wrong, then I apologize, but again, I thought about this bullshit deal for the whole 2 and one half hour roundtrip drive to Lovell (almost ran over a wild turkey I waz thinkin' se hardd) this morning.

Or is this just a case of a sack of shit coach by the name of Huggins slicing one useless player off his roster and trying to make himself look better in process? Every fiber of my body says that is the answer.
-----------------------------------------
You have to remember that I am a college basketball fan and am pretty familiar with some of the stuff that made the media at UC while Huggins coached there. Art Long was drunk and punched a police horse. Ruben Patterson (future nanny molester) did some nasty stuff. Lovable point guard Nick Van Exel, who led Huggins team to its only Final Four appearance, beat the crap out of a teammate at his jc (just because, apparently). Dontonio Wingfield, one of the most hyped recruits in school history only lasted a year in Cincy...God knows what he did. And on and on; lots of domestic violence type stuff...the kind that makes your stomach turn in knots at the sickness of the perpetrators. Whatever didn't make the media was possibly even worse but that's speculation and hearsay.

The key factor for all of the above dudes is that they could BALL. Hughes can't BALL. So first sign of trouble, he's gone. That's life in DI B-Ball if you play for Huggins or a bunch of similar coaches.

==============================
2) (Tangent) The greatness of Dean Smith.

Coach Smith has been retired for about a decade, and his legacy continues to grow, IMO. This is a man who got the best basketball of their careers out of problem children/future NBAers like JR Reid, Charlie Scott and even (holy crap, but this is true) Bob McAdoo. Today he is still all that a coach and man should be. I won't bore you (even more) with the details of things he has done on and off the court, but every day that Bob Knight continues to coach makes Coach Smith legacy more important and inspiring.

When I was a kid coach Knight of Indiana was IT. Three national championships: 76, 81, and 87. Those wicked warmups with the vertical stripes. He was full of fire. Yelled at anyone who got in his way. Coach Smith appeared to me to be sort of a whiny wimp. Getting to the Final Four every other year seemingly, but not winning it all until 1981 (Thanks MJ and Big Game James!). I wondered how Coach Smith and Coach Thompson of Georgetown, seemingly so different, could be talked about as being such good friends all during the two day runup to the Monday night final in New Orleans.

Answer: both were then and continue to be great men. Leaders with heart as well as fire. Social critics of wrongs that they thought needed correcting. The two greatest Coaches of the modern era (post 1980) IMO. And yes I remember coach K, but he, to me, is a coach with a c, not a C. Sorry, but those AmEx ads are a big turnoff. What else has he done? And Quin Snyder is not covering his old coach in glory, either. Mizzo was/is a big mess because of Snyder, who learned at the feet of K.

And back to Knight, who is just trying to win games, nothing more. He is a coach with a small c. Just a basketball guy. Two years after he retires, no one will have a nice thing to say about him. The stories are legion about his backstabbing of former friends who moved on when they realized Knight's loyalty ran one way: to him and him only. I just hope that he doesn't go out like another coach with a small c: Woody Hayes, though Hayes off the field may have done more for his young men, on the field he was a disaster until that night in '78 when he punched an opposing player and was released from his duties the next day. Hayes never even apologized to the player from Clemson he hit. It was a sad end, but appropriate. I see something very similar for Knight in two years, five years, maybe even a decade. But it is coming.

Huggins is no Bobby Knight. Not on his best day. Knight has graduated just about every player he's coached for four years. He has not had similar drunken escapades, at least that made the media. And I can't think of anyone who, while at IU made headlines for the violent crap that Huggins kids did. So if Huggins pales in comparison to Knight in every way but being a dick, then he ain't got much goin' for him, huh? Just a coach (small c).

==================================

Edit 9/7/06: No definative word on the types of crimes committed by the K-State (former) player. With no word that this kid really did something horrible, I'm sticking by my first call that Huggins was disposing to someone he thought couldn't play. Though he'll never get Bill Walker: goin' straight to The League, I think.

Sports Note: Kansas State's new B-Ball Head Coach Gets Tough...

....or does he?

Bob Huggins, noted for his 0 (zero) percent graduation rate at the U of Cincinnati in many years, for the numerous brushes (and outright shoves) with the law his players undertook while at UC, and for his multiple drunk driving offenses has kicked off his team some anonymous backup center for being a registered sex offender.

The problem is that, according to the kid's dad in an SI article, the offense occurred when Hughes was under 18 and presumedly (I know, a big assumption, but one that as of Monday at 8:30pm I'm willing to make) involved the kid having consensual sex with an underage girl. Of course I could be wrong and he did something awful and should be kicked off the team and off campus, but with the involvement of Huggins.....well, I'm suspicious.
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Anyway here's a quote from the SI article:
"'It is absolutely not what it seems,' Hughes' father, Rodney, told The Kansas City Star. 'But no matter right or wrong, it still doesn't look good.'

Hughes played in 26 games last season, averaging 1.7 points."
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And why am I suspicious?
1) K State basically has sucked at basketball for decades. For every Mitch Richmond and Rolando Blackman there have been a hundred stiffs. The fan support is usually there (thus the bucks laid out for Huggy Bear) but the roster currently has a few..um...not-so-good players left over from the previous regime.

2) Huggins is a sleaze but is beloved by former players he has exploited for four (actually make that two: jc) years. The zero percent graduation rate is not an exaggeration. There were very few players who played for Huggins at UC that got a degree, none that I know of. He didn't even bother to recruit one or two end of the benchers to bring up the team GPA; standard practice at big time schools. He just didn't give a shit about class/book learnin'. And to think this guy graduated with honors from West Virginia. Well, yeah, I know: WVU; not Ivy League. But still.

3) Hughes averaged 1.7 points per game.

4) 1+2+3=4 :Hughes was tying up a 'ship, and Huggins needed to polish up his image in Manhattan. So the revelation on Saturday (2 damn days ago!) of Hughes being a registered sex offender was too sweet to pass up: Revoke that ride, Bob, and save it for OJ Mayo or Bill Walker or some other stud. And sleep well at night.

Or not.


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One of the big reasons this story jumped out at me is that I went to college next door to Cincy; at Miami U in Oxford, OH. There are four schools in the area that are big basketball rivals: Xavier, Dayton, UC, and Miami, with MU usually but not always (Harp and Wally) having the weakest of the four teams. All four have terrific traditions, with UC having national championships and multiple final fours, and Dayton also a final four. But when I was in Oxford, UC was mediocre at best. Their coach was a really nice guy from Chicago, great player at UC, Tony Yates, who could recruit but didn't get the players to play hard. This didn't sit well with the UC alums, who remembered the Big O's glory days and the 2 titles and wanted similar results. So they made a deal with the devil: hire Huggins from Akron, knowing he cut corners. Within a season or two UC was in the final four with players from hither and yon. And Huggins could do whatever the hell he wanted for the next decade plus in the city. Finally a new UC President got some balls (of course it took a woman, but hey) and fired his ass after the embarrassing DUI video. Of course he found another school to coach at, but I'm happy he's gone from the greater Miami Valley. Dayton, X and Miami are classy schools with classy coaches. Now hopefully UC can get back on track and have a team to be proud of, both on and off the court.

"Original Zinn" by Howard Zinn with David Barsamian

A book subtitled "Conversations on History and Politics". (If you don't own a copy of "The People's History of the United States 1492- Present", then you really really should get one.) The following are some "Original Zinn" quotes from the text or people referred to in the text:

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Loyalty to the country always. Loyalty to the government when it deserves it.
- Mark Twain

Rise like Lions after slumber
In unvanquishable number —
Shake your chains to earth like dew
Which in sleep had fallen on you —
Ye are many — they are few.
- Percy Shelley, "The Mask of Anarchy" - Written in 1819 after 11 demonstrators against the nation's economic disparities were killed and hundreds wounded by British troops in Manchester.

War is the health of the State. It automatically sets in motion throughout society those irresistable forces for uniformity, for passionate cooperation with the Government in coercing into obedience the minority groups and individuals which lack the larger herd sense...the nation in war-time attains a uniformity of feeling, a hierarchy of values culminating at the undisputed apex of the State ideal, which could not possibly be produced through any other agency than war...The State is intimately connected with war, for it is the organization of the collective community when it acts in a political manner, and to act in a political manner towards a rival group has meant, throughout all history - war...
- Randolph Bourne

If fascism ever comes to America, it will come wrapped in an American flag.
- Huey P. Long, "The Kingfish", Louisiana governor - Assassinated 9/10/35

Even when pressed by the demands of inner truth, men do not easily assume the task of opposing their government's policy, especially in time of war.
- Martin Luther King's speech at Riverside Church in NYC, April 4, 1967 denouncing the war in Vietnam. He was assassinated exactly one year later.

In the original version of "This Land Is Your Land" Woody Guthrie protested class inequality with the verse:

In the squares of the city, In the shadow of a steeple;
By the relief office, I'd seen my people.
As they stood there hungry, I stood there asking,
Is this land made for you and me.
- Woody Guthrie's famous "This Land is Your Land" was written in 1940, but the lyrics were often changed in future decades in order to suppress any socialist themes.

How do you ask a man to be the last man to die for a mistake?
- John Kerry's Testimony before subcommittees of the U.S. Senate, April, 1971

You just never know when this stuff will come in handy...

The FBI....for kids!!. (Be prepared...!)

And here's where you report your wierd neighbor, who annoys the crap out of you and you'd like him/her/them/it to move far far away: Click here...Then report away!!

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These are just some of the important services brought to you by the George W. Bush administration. Thanks, W! And W's friends!

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Remember the last really cool, good war? (Here's a list of US military interventions..Gee, what a long list!) World War II? When we had a REAL Hitler to fight (and Tojo too!)? Not some penny ante "Hitler" like Hussein or Noriega or Ho Chi Minh or Castro (Bay of Pigs) or Taliban or...who am I forgetting? So many "Hitlers".

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Here's an actual quote from Supreme Court Justice Robert Jackson on the eve of the Nuremburg War Crimes Trials following the defeat of Nazi Germany, where he served his country well as lead prosecutor:

"We must make clear to the Germans that the wrong for which their fallen leaders are on trial is not that they lost the war, but that they started it. And we must not allow ourselves to be drawn into a trial of the causes of the war, for our position is that no grievances or policies will justify resort to aggressive war. It is utterly renounced and condemned as an instrument of policy."

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Golly, how times have changed.

Hey, ya gotta just go with the flow baby.... Right? Just worry about getting through the day, pay the bills, do the laundry and trust that our nation's leaders have our best interests at heart, know what they are doing, and care about us everyone. It's such a relaxing feeling.

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Prediction: 3 Supporting Oscar Nods for TDWP

Saw "The Devil Wears Prada" this morning. Perfect summer movie, meaning it was lightweight, fun, nasty in all the right places and just a very good time. And I was the only person in the theatre it was being shown in, so I felt like I had my own personal screening room. (No I did not belch or scratch certain areas of my body just cuz I was alone...)

Anne Hathaway played the....um..."Anne Hathaway" role in an earnest and appealing manner. Since she is, well, Anne Hatheway. But the actors who kept this clever, fast moving, laugh out loud script humming were the supporting cast.

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Meryl Streep is clearly the **STAR** of the film, being The Devil aka Miranda Priestly, editor of a "Vogue" style fashion magazine titled "Runway", but her Oscar Nomination will certainly be in the Supporting category. It would be too much of a slap in young Ms. Hathaway's face for the producers to push for a Leading Role nomination.

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Andy Sachs (the Anne Hathaway character): You look so skinny!
Emily (Miranda's first assistant and hoping to be taken to France by Miranda): Really? Thanks. I'm on this new diet for Paris. I don't eat anything... and then when I feel like I'm about to faint, I eat a cube of cheese.

(later) Emily: I'm one stomach flu away from reaching my goal weight.

Emily, Miranda Priestly's first assistant, is played by the young British actress Emily Blunt. I think she is this year's Amy Adams (if you haven't seen "Junebug", please do. And off that film Adams has much more work coming out soon). Desperately desperately afraid of failing the boss she despises yet worships, Emily attempts to put recent hire Andy in her place from the moment they meet. But being that Andy has the lead role in the film, I think Emily (no last name given) would have been smart to buddy up, though that would have left out many delicious facial expressions, nervous habits, bulging eye stares of disbelief, and the wonderment of listening to Emily's strange middle-class-but-trying-to-come-across-as-upper-class British accent. Just terrific stuff from Blunt, who has done a bit of tv work but no major US films. Hope her accent doesn't hold her back from bigger (though I can hardly expect better) roles.

Even in a weak year for American film, I would be surprised if she got a nomination, though can't imagine many better supporting performances being released in 2006.

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Stanley Tucci plays the role of Nigel (again, no last name given), who appears to be second in charge at "Runway". The part is clearly supposed to be gay, but thankfully director David Frankel allows an actor of the highest quality to do with it what he will. Which is play Nigel as a completely NON flaming art director who is at ease in the world of women's fashion without the mannerisms associated with the usual gay screen stereotypes. Tucci does a great job, and it's about time as I don't know of anything interesting he's done since 2000's "Joe Gould's Secret", which Tucci directed and starred in.

Potential Oscar nod number three for Mr. Tucci in the Best Supporting Actor category.

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Other standouts:

Simon Baker as the "you know he's too good to be true" writer.
Daniel Sunjata plays a designer with big dreams.
Stephanie Szostak as Miranda's rival, Jacqueline Follet, though she has few lines.

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A final note. Adrian Grenier should thank his lucky stars that buddy Frankel was directing. They worked together on "Entourage". I just can't imagine Grenier having to audition for this part. On an open casting call, I am certain there would be a hundred better "intelligent hunks" who could have played his boyfriend role with at least a touch of charisma and sexiness. Not sure if Grenier was ever a model, and he may be too old now, but man, he is no leading man. Apparently Frankel or the studio sliced out a good bit of his part prior to release. Thankfully. The editor and others involved in the final cut must have realized "more "Runway" and less "Andy's real life" would make for a better film.

"The Devil Wears Prada" now hold the crown for "Best film I've seen this summer." Though that only makes two. And I plan on seeing "World Trade Center" and "An Inconvenient Truth" soon. I don't think either will match up to Miranda Priestly though.

That's all.

Cut and Run!!! Cut and Run!!!

No more freedom fries in the Congressional cafeteria. Oh my God, the wimps are winning! Those sneaky Frenchies...

Said one of the above "French" fries: "Just when I thought that I was out they pull me back in!"

What's next? What more possibly could go wrong in the world?

.....Oh....

5 Rules of the Road, M********R, plus #6 is just a rant.

1) Use your right turn signal at least once a day. Medical professionals say that use of a right turn signal can prevent heart disease, tuberculosis, and getting an '06 Corolla rammed up your ass. Just once a day. Try it. It helps out.

2) If you are driving 67mph in the passing lane on 95, get the f**k over to the slow lane. Right now. No matter what.

3) For the cautious driver please note that travelling 55mph in a 65 mph is about as dangerous to you and the rest of the crew around you as if you are motoring at about 85. It is usually difference in speed on a highway that leads to trouble. So please, please just go at least 65, oldtimer. Or maybe 64...ok?

4) Indecipherable license plates give me headaches. I saw one the other day on Maine plates: "SMALPT". What the F**K does THAT mean?!?!? It makes no sense. That damn car was not commercial, just a regular volkswagen or honda or something generic. Is this your license plate? Explain yourself! Do you mean "HALFPINT"? Or "SMALL...whatever..maybe FRY"? I am banging my damn skull into my keyboard right now trying to figure that one out.

I know, I know. Personalized plates cost about nothing. But what the F**K good is a "special" plate when no one other than your immediate family and coworkers have a clue as to what you are trying to say, and only because you spent 15 minutes explaining the "special meaning" to each and every one of them?

Vanity plates: I just don't get it. No, I don't get it. Never have.

5) It should be goddamn illegal to be driving a brang spankin' new, bright (I say B-R-I-G-H-T) Red Monte Carlo SS 39mph in a 50 zone, like I got stuck behind in Kennebunkport/Arundel tonight. What is the point of having a muscle car if ya ain't usin' da muscle. To pick up chicks? I guess, but Arundel isn't the most happening spots for picking up 50+ year old honeys, bud. Pick it the F**K up, por favor.

6) Not really a rule, but when an 89 year old woman (from Vermont) wins a $2 plus million dollar lottery and says she'll pay off her car loan, she goddamn better be driving a fleet of Ferraris. Or she is very, very, very senile. What a shame. I think I'll stab myself with a big fucken fork in the eye right now.

She'll pay off her car loan with the $2 million dollars (less about $1 million in Uncle Sam's cut) apparently. Ms. Jewett-Emery is quoted in the Press Herald as saying her vehicle would require a "big chunk" of the loot....so she obviously drives at least an original Hummer or a new 750 BMW at present time? Someone get this old broad a Sharper Image catalog. An unlimited miles air pass with whatever carrier she chooses. Whatever. Just don't pay off the Buick Century 1989 Limited Edition with your damn $2 million. Please. If this is possible then surely you got screwed on the financing.

Just to note....

Ms. Jewett-Emery has been cited several times in the past two decades by Springfield, VT police for various violations, including the following three misdemeanors:

- 12/15/04: cited for paying a $4.35 bill for pantyhose at the local Target Superstore with four ones, five nickels and a dime. It took Ms. Jewett-Emery 23 minutes to retrieve the change from her change purse, leading to 3 heart attacks among the customers waiting in line behind her. She paid her $50 dollar fine with a twenty dollar bill, four fives, thirty quarters, and 250 pennies, all of which smelled of "Snug Denture Cushions", also located in Ms. Jewett-Emery's changepurse.

- 3/22/05: citing for incorrect use of turn signals by a local patrol officer, as. Mr. Jewett-Emery has had her left turn signal in the "ON" position since the death of her husband Emery Emery, back in the spring of 1988. Enough was enough.

- 8/08/06: cited for paying Herbie, the guy who cuts her lawn and at 37 lives at home with his mother and their 6 cats $20 for mowing her lawn for the months of July and August 2006. This was after she had won the $2 million. Apparently she is trying to prevent Herbie from getting all "uppity" and prevent him from "sticking his nose in the air" about knowing a millionaire such as Ms. Jewett-Emery. The citation was for "Sensational Cheapness Following an Unforeseen Financial Windfall". Ms. Jewett-Emery once again paid her $50 fine with small bills and smelly loose change.

The New Business Paradigm (cont.)

Is this connected to this?

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From the first article:

"Oil company BP PLC reported Tuesday its net profit rose 30 percent in the second quarter, as soaring world oil prices counterbalanced lower oil and gas output. Chief Executive John Browne also announced that he would step down at the end of 2008.

BP, one of the world's largest oil companies, posted a net profit of $7.3 billion for the three months ending June 30, up from $5.6 billion a year earlier. Revenue rose 24 percent to $73.5 billion from $59.3 billion."

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From the latter:

"Oil production in Alaska has long been a concern for environmental campaigners although companies insist safety and the eco-issues are prioritised above profits.

Following the move by BP to shut down half the production on Alaska’s North Slope after finding severe corrosion in a Prudhoe Bay oil transit line, US politician John Harris, who speaks for Alaska in the House of Representatives, praised BP for taking immediate action.

'This state cannot afford to have another Exxon Valdez,' he said."

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No we/they can't. That's for sure.

Yes, let's all praise BP for caring about us, the consumer. And the kids. The kids, too. They do it all for them.

"(N)et profit rose 30 percent in the second quarter, as soaring world oil prices counterbalanced lower oil and gas output" --->> LOWER OIL AND GAS OUPUT leads to "the move by BP to shut down half the production on Alaska’s North Slope". Or am I just being ridiculous? Maybe both. Yeah....both.

Four dollars a gallon by the end of the summer or early fall? Possibly. But thank heavens it's all going for a good cause. At least according to Alaskan pol Harris. Today, I've noticed the gas stations down the road apiece have raised prices about 10 cents/gallon. Not bad. I expected a bolder move. We'll see what lies ahead.

I'm buying a ten speed, right quick.

Ricky Bobby: "Jackie Stewart Superstar!"

"When Ricky Bobby drives in circles for two hours, he's a highly paid professional NASCAR driver. When I do it, I'm lost."
Paraphrased from a joke on SonsofSamHorn.

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(Spoiler Alert: Plot details may be in following post)

Well, I saw it. And it was all a man could have hoped for. Very, very funny.

The question now is: Is The Ballad of Ricky Bobby one of the great sports movies, or just a terrific flick that will leave the collective consciousness in a few months, like "Wayne's World" going way back, or more recently "Analyse This/That/Whatever the first one was called" ? I pretty much guarantee a good time if you choose to see TBORB. John C. Reilly already got an Oscar nod, so they won't give him one for this, but possibly Will Ferrell? (I know, comedies don't get nominations but "The Piano" does....sheesh.)

The producers must have smelled sure thing because the racing scenes are top notch and must have cost quite a bit. This is no "Meatballs" or what have you with cheesy sets and so forth. There was some serious coin spent on this one and Will Ferrell delivers bigtime. The supporting cast was outstanding. I thought that somehow Apollo's manager from the Rocky movies had done some time machine thing until I noticed on the closing credits that Michael Clarke Duncan played the pit crew boss role: dude's lost some weight and looks good. Still got the voice, too! Also: the always excellent Gary Cole and Jane Lynch as Bobby's parents, Leslie Bibb and Amy Adams as the luvvvv interests, Greg Germann and a funny Molly Shannon as team owner/spouse, and an indeciferable and hilarious Sasha Cohen with boytoy Andy Richter as the couple that try to knock off Ricky from his damn high horse.

Best movie I've seen since the winter....also the only movie I've seen in a theatre since the winter, but still it was damn good!

this 'n that on a beyyuuuuwtiful Sunday afternoon...

1) Yes, those Waltons are wonderful Christian folk.

And the good Christian folk that they put out of business that run good Christian folk-type book stores and such are just pleased as punch about it. Seriously. No I am not being sarcastic. Looka' here at an AP article.

Quote from Chuck Wallington, noted business expert...and Christian: "As a Christian retailer, you're kind of torn because your mission statement, a big part of it, is getting the word of the Gospel out. If WalMart is carrying Christian books, is it a bad thing? I'm not sure it is. But obviously, from a business standpoint, it's challenging."

You see, Mr. Wallington, who is apparently from Denver, is world class clueless. (My opinion, as the quotes have been closed from above). WalMart a Christian retailer? Anti-union, pro sweatshop, anti-health coverage, money grubbing, "retail Darwinist" WalMart are Christians because they sell some pamphlets and trinkets and maybe even a "Christian" book or four? Give me a break. The Walton family would suck the bone marrow out of their customers if it helped the bottom line. Mr. Wallington, you deserve to be on Keith Olbermann's People of the Week segment, though certainly not as the "Worst", just the "Biggest Bonehead". I always wondered why every single Christian bookstore I drive by always seems to close within a couple of months. Must be God's will. Or the Waltons. Same diff.

The Big Question:

Would Jesus, if he existed, talk the talk AND walk the walk (I'm going street here.....for the kids.)? Would Jesus have bought stock in WalMart? I think not. Not that other large companies and big box stores are much different. They just aren't as good at acting like vampires as WalMart and the Waltons. Actually, in the New Testament Jesus gave a goldarn about poor folks (he...um...was one.) and hated hypocrisy. Maybe the folks SELLING the Bibles should actually READ THEM, too.

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2) From this morning's Sunday paper insert on Baby Boomers, and how gosh darn lucky they are!!!!:

"Retail represents a second career.

"When today's snowbirds pack their bags to head south for the winter, they throw in their beach towels, golf clubs and tennis racquets - right alongside their orange Home Depot aprons."

Oh yeah, I hope my Mom, who is 68, gets the chance to work the drive through at some fast food joint in a couple of years, or show folks how to frame their prized artwork at some home goods store, once our second three term President W (the Constitution was changed before on this after FDR, so I'm am sure there is something in the works, since he's a war President and we are at War with, well everybody at this point. It might just happen. Can't change riders in midstream....or midavalanche, I suppose.) eliminates Social Security for anyone who has not earned over $250K in one year, since they are really the ones who deserve the SS benefits, using the "Tinkle Down Theory" of economics. The rest are leeches and losers, so says (or will say Bush..just wait...[darn open microphones]). Will you believe him, come 2008? Or maybe even 2012 ("Eight more years!! Eight more years!")?

"Tinkle Down"...today just a theory....tomorrow a way of life (like the Laughter Curve). Or has it been "Tinkle Down" all the time? Jes' wonderin'.

===================================

3) Back to sports.....ah, sports. Here's Mike Adams, who is sober today and will not try any non/never were funny "jokes":

a) the Red Sox are scaring me and every member of Red Sox Nation. Where is the starting pitching? I thought Big Schill' and Pap might have turned the tide two nights ago with that 3-2 win but nooooooo. Wells was ok for a while last night, but a bunch of seeing-eye grounders up the middle led to four runs, and the rout was on. And of course the over the hill Javy Lopez bounced into a DP on the first pitch in the top of the ninth to kill the rally. Why the f--k was Lopez (who really sucks, but is living off that one great year for the Braves a while back) batting freakin' sixth? Gonzo or....well, someone needs to be sixth. And Javy, bud, Red Sox hitters don't always swing at the first pitch. They work the count. You, at 30-whatever need to talk to Papa Jack and talk to Youk and Papi. Learn patience.....THEN you can whiff.

b) not just the Red Sox, but the Pats, too, are worrying me. I haven't followed it closely enough to know if Branch is being unreasonable, but damn it, they need him back. Not now, maybe even not for a couple of weeks, but they do not want a situation that may kill chemistry. I doubt that will happen, but this has not been a good offseason for the three time champs, and of course Seymour is hurting too. At least we get a full season WITHOUT Duane Starks costing the team a game or two. Real NFL caliber corners and safeties this year.

c) A cylist failing a drug test? Man, they are all on something. Do you really believe that the sainted Armstrong competed against these blood dopers and steroid freaks WITHOUT some help? He ain't Superman. But since he retired never failing a drug test, then I guess his record stands and Landis will be exiled. Thas' da way it goes sometime.

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Time to go see some Ricky Bobby!

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Edit: hypocrisy, not hypocrasy.

The resident of Apartment 404 and author of Apartment404 has been notified by editor Russ Cousy (Russ_Cousy@Editor.Apartment404.blogspot.com) that he can't spell for s--t, and should maybe proofread a little bit. Other stuff was changed with little to no improvement in the quality of today's post.